Starsinger

Nightmares

This time Aaron was standing in a tall, narrow tower of Ellanoi Palace, peering through a tall, narrow window.

The streets were filled with people running, but they made no sound. Far below he could see his sisters and his father caught in the pull of the crowd. Other faces swam by – Felicity and Mason dragging along a hapless Whitley. Melody, the flirtatious luminary, carriying a torch like a weapon. Gavran winging overhead, too far away for Aaron to see his face.

A black cloud billowed from the earth and swallowed the writhing masses. Somewhere, Sapphire screamed.

Are you important? Lord Malcolm sneered.

Aaron gripped the ledge until his knuckles turned white, paralyzed by fear. Darkness swallowed the city, swallowed the palace gates and rose, rose to meet him.

Queen Tatiana stepped forward from the darkness, her sword glinting in the fading light. Aaron fell to his knees. Helpless.

"Save them," he begged. "I'll do anything."

The steel point was cold against his chest. Tatiana smiled.

Aaron woke in his hammock, sweat pooling over his body. He inhaled deeply and held it, willing the furious pace of his heartbeat to slow. His head was pounding.

He exhaled and the exhaustion swept over him. He hadn't been sleeping well. The dream had been haunting him since their escape from Vivalta, jolting him awake in the middle of the night, his whole body tense and desperate to flee.

But you're okay. You're safe aboard the Drake. The ship had sustained some damage in the storm, and Katrina had her crew working double shifts to patch the mast and right the rigging. The wind was blowing strong and true now as they raced for Aster, but they had lost precious time. The full moon was only two days away, along with Crolton's navy and the fatemongers' attack, and the Drake couldn't outpace them.

Aaron sighed, and he heard the hammock beside him shift slightly.

"Can't sleep?" Sapphire murmured.

"Not anymore."

"Nightmare?"

"Mmm," Aaron answered noncommittally.

Sapphire reached one arm out from her canvas bed to hang in the air between them. Aaron clasped her hand, reveling in the ever-present warmth of her skin.

Since the storm, they had all been busy. Pitching in to help the crew with repairs, building Raelyn's machine, and adjusting their plans for Aster. They couldn't count on beating their enemies to the prize anymore. Instead, they'd be walking straight into a battlefield.

But if the days were for work, the nights were their own. No one said anything when Aaron started stringing his hammock up closer to Sapphire.

She shifted her grip to brush his knuckles with her thumb and a shiver of warmth shot up his arm. Sapphire made a surprised noise in the back of her throat as her hammock swayed perilously beneath her.

Aaron grinned. "One of these days you're going to fall out."

"It'll be your fault."

"You could join me." He'd said it without thinking. Now his heart was beating in his ears again, this time from a different kind of fear. "If you want."

There was a long pause. Then Aaron felt Sapphire's hand retreat. Her hammock dipped and bounced as she slipped free.

She appeared at his side, chewing her lip. "How?"

Aaron grabbed the edge of a nearby crate for stability. "As best you can."

She was nimble and he did his best to hold the hammock steady, but still the canvas sling bucked and threatened to dump them both flat onto the steerage floor. They were biting back laughter when Sapphire finally managed to tumble in.

Aaron drew in a sharp breath. The hammock was a confusion of limbs, pressing together on all sides as the canvas cradled their bodies close. She was everywhere.

Sapphire froze. "Is this okay?"

"Yes," he croaked. "Yes. Are you okay?"

"Yes."

Aaron twisted one arm out from under him to wrap around Sapphire's back, and she rolled slightly to rest her head in the crook of his shoulder. He breathed slowly, giving himself a moment to adjust to the closeness.

"You keep having nightmares," said Sapphire.

"Maybe the fatemongers are after me."

He'd meant it as a joke, a reference to the silly children's story, but he felt her tense in response.

"Promise you won't let me hurt anyone."

His arms tightened. "You won't."

"You can't know that." She shivered, and he tucked her closer into his chest. "Ezra is ready. He's waiting for me."

"Then he's going to be sorely disappointed."

"You've seen me," she said. "When I lose control. You don't know what I'm capable of."

Aaron shivered. "I know," he muttered. "But I also know you. The traitor that Ezra imagines you to be, this Shadow, it's not who you are. Do you want to hurt anyone? Bring the age of darkness and cast down the Star? Do you want to hurt Raelyn?"

"No. Never." She was staring away from him, avoiding his gaze. "But if it's destiny... What if what I want doesn't matter?"

"Our choices always matter."

She looked at him then, really looked at him, and Aaron's breath caught in his throat.

"I've given you every reason to distrust me," she said. "Every reason to be afraid. Why aren't you?"

Aaron slowly traced his fingers up and down the skin of her elbow. "I realized a while ago that away from you is the last place I want to be."

"Took you long enough to say so."

He smiled into her hair. "Didn't think there was much hope in it."

She shook her head at him, mouth twitching with amusement.

"You know," she said quietly, and she kissed the spot where his jaw met his throat. "For someone who sees so much." Her lips moved further down his jaw. "You can be surprisingly hard to get through to." She raised herself up until her face hovered above his.

"I'm here," she said. "I don't ever want to let go."

Aaron's chest quaked and he pulled her down close, pressing his mouth to hers. Then she was moving against him, hands searching and insistent. Aaron kissed her hard and clutched at the thin fabric of her tunic, heat pooling below his belly. Their fingers dipped under hems and waistbands, starting slow and curved as question marks, then unraveling into exclamation points, yes, built on yes, built on yes.

Sapphire pulled back suddenly, gasping. "I don't have silphi root."

Aaron's brain was scrambled. "Me neither." He quirked a smile. "Didn't think I'd need to bring birth control on my princess-saving mission."

"Another time, then?" Sapphire raised an eyebrow. "If we survive?"

You can die, Tatiana whispered in his head.

Aaron smiled shakily. "If we survive."