Late Bloomer

Chapter 6- It's Not You, It's Me

A couple weeks later, Lena texted and invited Kara and Alex to the lab, saying she had made some progress and wanting to show them, as well as get Alex's input on something. Kara had left the Vicks off again, knowing they'd be entering the lab, and was happy to notice that Lena's scent was again mild when Lena opened the door for them. It was still tempting, like it had been at the DEO, but nothing like it had been that day at lunch.

"Hi! Thanks for coming."

Kara gave Lena a hug, holding onto her for just a second too long before releasing her. She was pleasantly surprised when Alex hugged Lena as well, who didn't even stiffen up as she returned it. The two had been starting to become friends, before everything with Lex, so she was happy that her problems had a positive side effect and seemed to be helping them bond and rebuild that friendship again. Kara had hated that her own actions had left Lena not only feeling betrayed by her, but also cut off from her friends since they had also been in on the secret.

"Are you kidding? Not only am I super excited to get out of the house, being a mom is fantastic, but I also miss the action a bit, and this stuff with Kara's biology is so interesting. I can't believe I never really looked into it before!"

"Honestly, me neither. I was curious about Supergirl the whole time, but I never felt like I could ask about anything - I didn't want to risk sounding like a Luthor trying to learn about a Super to find her weaknesses. If I had known she was Kara, I probably wouldn't have been able to contain my curiosity. We probably would have been looking into some of this quite some time ago."

Alex hummed in thought, "I guess I just was so used to Kara, my sister, that I didn't really think of her as Kara, the alien. Which is in some ways a good thing, but I also feel guilty because I think this whole maturity process would've been much easier had we been prepared for it in advance."

Kara didn't want Alex to feel guilty, she was just as complacent in assuming her 'humanity' as anyone else. If she hadn't just shoved her problems in a proverbial box under the bed, she probably would've been the one to bring up the topic.

"Hey – Alex, don't do that. It's not your fault, like I've said before. I always wanted to be normal, and I think I just shoved any feeling, or lack thereof, that wasn't what I deemed 'normal' away and tried not to think about it."

Lena, who hadn't been involved when the Danvers sisters had talked about Kara's lack of sexual desire before irstun, was looking on intently with her eyebrows furrowed.

"What do you mean, Kara? The AI didn't say much about how it would have been for you, before irstun."

Kara shrugged, still not sure how to best put her experiences in words.

"I convinced myself that I had felt sexual desire, but that it just wasn't as big of a deal as everyone made it out to be. I dated, I had sex a few times, and I felt romantic feelings on occasion, but it all just seemed so... disconnected. Dull. I couldn't figure out the difference between friendship and romantic feelings."

Lena nodded slowly, biting her lip. "And...now?" Her voice lilted upwards at the end, sounding hopeful.

Kara took a breath. "Now, it's very clear. I don't know, it's a like there was a part of me that was asleep my whole life and now it's awake. I was missing something and now I have it and although I don't always understand the feelings or instincts I suddenly have, it's a bit like seeing color for the first time. I feel so alive."

Lena smiled, holding Kara's gaze. She looked like she wanted to say something, opening and closing her mouth a few times but ultimately remaining silent. Kara noticed her heartbeat had been increasing throughout the whole conversation and a flush was starting to creep up in Lena's cheeks. They remained like that, just looking at each other, until Alex cleared her throat uncomfortably.