It was 4:53 am on a Monday morning. Alan was driving his "friend" Derrek home from the pub, Derrek was a big burly strong sweaty man Alan thought to himself , while he was fantasizing about Derrek Alan had mistakenly run over an old lady. He did not seem to notice however and kept driving. Alan looked over at Derek he was fast asleep. Alan arrived at his house he gave him a gentle kiss on the tongue trying not to wake him up and pushed him out of the car he then sped 90 down the Sligo backroads Alan then came to a breaching halt narrowly avoiding his front fence.
Alan busted through his kitchen door and took his schizophrenic pills. all of this eating had made him hungry he decided to ring his local 2.51-star restaurant jimmy the chipper. the phone was ringing someone picked up "مرحبا مرحبا بكم في جيمي تشيبر ما تريد" a loud and shouty Arabic fan answered, "hello can i have some fried rice with extra peas" Alan waited for a reply he could hear heavy breathing through the speaker "هو أن كل نيغا" the man replied "could I also have a flat lucozade and throw in some extra red sauce packets." Alan waited yet again. "طيب الحمد لله" alan quickly replied "good day to you to s--" the big greasy sweaty Arabic man had hung up, now all Alan had to do was wait.
YOU ARE READING
Alan Odonnel and the magic fried rice
FantasyAlan Odonnel was a normal man living in county Sligo he enjoyed the simple things in life like underground midget fight clubs and eating his favorite meal fried rice from jimmy the chippers.
