Sell Some Lives

Hysterectomy

One of my shaking hands was locked over the shattered remains of my kneecap. The abortionist was holding the meat pulverizer over her head. She'd been hammering at my stomach for half an hour now and accidentally missed.

"...Please... I need a break." I gasped, through the pain. 

"You should have thought of that before you got yourself pregnant." She shrugged. 

"But- I- didn't-"

My vision was blurred with warm blood streaming from between my legs, dripping onto the already bloody bedsheets. I could taste the blood at the back of my throat. 

We'd been going through different methods for hours now. All of them were painful. Miss Aloura didn't have herbs, leeches, stairs (so i could fall down) or hot water in the house — nothing painless. Only knifes, coat hangers (we tried that but it didn't seem to do anything) and hammers and meat pulverizers.

Fingertips prodded my tummy.

"Still with me? We're going to have to cut this out."

Miss Aloura half-buried her fingers inside me. She looked so cold and uncaring. I couldn't understand it. But then she must have been doing this for years.

I saw her rootle through her instruments drawer and pull out a sharp knife. We hadn't used a knife yet. I tried to sit up.

"Calm down. Just relax and think of something you like."

I didn't know what I liked. I didn't have any interests because there was no time for them what with my job at the coal mines and everything. I had liked playing soldiers with the coals but I didn't want to be a soldier. 

I shut my eyes and thought of my mother instead. Of the good times that I could barely remember, like when she took me to the tearooms and we shared a teacake, Tarte Tatin and frog's legs and talked about going to America one day. Then we walked along the canal and my mother told me about how different things would be when she had a husband... I wished she'd kept me.

I felt a sharp pain inside. No not my heart. The lady was cutting my nerves which burned beyond the ability to register the brutality. I tried not to scream. Abortions didn't hurt as much as giving birth did, everyone knew that. So why was it hurting so much?

I was sweating, burning up, shaking and trying not to pass out at the same time. I wondered what was happening to the... foetus. Was it in pain too?

I felt Miss Aloura digging the knife in deeper, slashing fast, quick, expertly. When she severed the last few ligaments holding my uterus in place, she yanked it out. My pussy was in pure agony and there was something inside the bloody bag she'd just thrust on the bed. I picked it up and put it on my lap, deciding to see what it looked like.