Echoes Of Eden

Alone for now

I open his car door crying, out of breath from running down the driveway to get away from my parents, his sweet brown eyes stare into my soul as he asks what happens, he pulls into a hug and i already feel better. No one could understand me or love me like he does, i think. He starts the car and we  drive down the curved roads in the forest by my house. He tells me we'll be ok and he doesn't care about other people. I sigh in relief, happy i have him. It's raining heavy, the roads are slippery but i'm not worried. The road turns around the lake and i think about how cold it must be. The roads too wet though. We turn, and slide off the road into the grass. Dean tries to break but it's too late. The car tips forward and straight into the lake. Dean rolls down both of our windows. The car begins to fill as i take my seat belt off, and i'm panicking. It's filing fast, my fingers becoming numb from the almost frozen water. His seatbelt is now submerged and won't come undone. My hands tear at the fabric holding him down. I grab a broken bottle off the floor and try to cut his seat belt, but it cuts my hand. I drop it. I have to hold my breath now. Im leaned over fighting with his belt, he pushes me off with as much force as he can. I hit my back on the passenger door and stare at him wide-eyed. He tilts his head up, telling me to swim out of the open window. I shake my head no and grab his hand, trying to pull him out. I pull and pull but when  he lets go, i realize i cant make him come with. I turn and swim out the window. I want to go back to him but i can't hold my breath much longer. Im out of the water, gasping for air, seeing flashing lights, hearing people shout to each other. Others are watching and talking as a EMT pulls me out of the lake. Im coughing up water as she wraps me in a towel and has me sit on the edge of the ambulance. She tries to do tests but i cant sit still, i'm too focused on him. She tells another medic something and they walk away. I cant feel it but i think im screaming his name. Begging for him to come up. I don't know when i'll stop and im sobbing as my best friend Red runs up to me. She's holding me and i'm clinging to her clothes. Her skin is burning hot and im so exhausted . My grip is loosening. I pass out. I wake up to the smell of medicine and sadness in a hospital with my father holding my hand. He tells a doctor im awake and a tall brunette woman walks in. She begins to talk, im listening and waiting for the news of Dean to leave her lips but she never says his name. My throat is dry and i can barely talk. Looking up at her i say, "Is Dean ok?" She doesn't respond with words, she just looks at me sadly and shakes her head.

That's my last memory of my boyfriend Dean.

It's been two weeks since i lost Dean. My hospital stay is longer than i wish, I don't know when i get to leave but i don't care. I can only think about Dean, how he looked right before i swam away, before i left him there to die. Im staring at a wall in my bleak room. Theres a wooden table next to me with the bible on it, my mom had come by and brought it. She had told me something about how it would help me heal to connect with the lord, i haven't really been able to focus on anything. Theres a few chairs, a tiny yellow flower in a pot on the windowsill, a stuffed rabbit i assume my parents left sitting on one of the chairs. The lighting gives the whole room a green tint, along with the cold AC it feels sad in here.
Looking for the little puzzle toy i asked my mom to bring me I hear the door open and see Lauren's, my nurse, bright green nails as she waves before entering. She looks happier than usual "Hi Ms. Blackwood, i have the forms to clear you here! We just have to tell your parents a few things then you're all good to go." I give her a weak smile as she continues, "Came here to give you the change of clothes your parents brought by yesterday." She leaves the outfit in my lap and walks out. The clothes consist of a change of under garments, those itchy lace socks i want to throw out, a simple blue dress with straps and small floral patterns, and a new pair of white flats. I change and wait for my parents. They visited me quite often, they didn't seem mad but i can't be sure. My parents open the door and Mom gives me a big squeeze and says "Oh i'm so glad my girls alright!" I give a forced laugh. We walk down the white hallway that reeks of medicine and vomit. I see a girl being wheeled into a room with severe burns, her guts out. Shocked I fasten my pace, walking past a old lady with amazing smelling perfume. The scent was so wonderful compared to the rest of the hall. We finally get to the front desk where a short lady with curly buns asks my dad to sign a stack of forms and gives him a pen with a fake flower attached to the top. After signing we go to the parking garage and find the car. My mom sits in the back with me since we have to drive down that road to get home. Im nervous as the car starts and she holds my hand. We're driving when we start to approach it. Im holding her hand so hard I'm scared it'll pop. My dad looks back, "Honey i know you're going through things but it's just a road. Don't get worked up." Usually I hold my tongue around him because he can be mean but something about what he said set me off. "Sorry that me being scared of the lake where i almost died, where i lost Dean is SO inconvenient for you dad." Regretting it right after the words left my mouth, i looked towards the floor. I could see in the rear view mirror that he was pissed but waiting until we got home. We arrive and i open the door quick, walking up the driveway before my parents. I hear my dad shout, "Eden don't you dare walk away from me!" but i've already closed the door behind me. Before i could take off my shoes, he grabs my shoulder. I don't remember much of what he said until he slapped me, "That's what happens to girls who disrespect their father." I nod and ran up the stairs, carefully closed my door as tears fall from my eyed.

The next 2 months were a blur really. I went to school, people pitied me, said they were sorry for what happened, my grades fell, my friends stopped talking to me because i "totally brought the mods down", and everything reminded me of Dean. My sweet Dean, gone far too soon. Every day and night i wish i was the one who died in that lake instead. He was an athlete, who had straight A's and was incredibly kind. He had just gotten accepted to his dream college the week before. I was helping clean after school when Dean rushed into my class and hugged me, so excited to tell me the news. It was upstate, near all the private academies. He was telling me he bought an apartment, and he wanted me to run away and live with him, how he got a lot of money from his parents so he could afford to pay for us both. I was so ready to spend the rest of my life with Dean that i decided to tell my parents about him, that i was going to move with him. If only i didn't. The day i told them i was so distraught after our fight i called Dean in a panic. He wouldn't have been driving on that slippery road by the lake if i hadn't called him.