Why Me?

PARALYZED

-David's POV-               *MONDAY*

Coach told us to hit the lockers once we were exhausted from practice. Everybody else, including the coach, left to change, but I didn't. I decided to store all the equipment on the field in the sports storage closet. As captain of the Ember's Prep High School football team, I took it upon myself to help out whenever I can. Not only in the sport or with the team but with anything my coach or teammates need help with. 

I had noticed Zayden on the bleachers, watching as we practiced but he was talking to someone on the phone. I was guessing it was Jackson. Then Zayden descended down the bleachers. I honestly couldn't help but bite my lip. He looks so hot wearing that skirt and crop top. I've always liked Zayden, but he's dating Jackson, and I have to respect that. Either way, I'm with Amanda. 

He smirked when he saw me checking him out. This is one of the dynamics of our friendship; we all flirt occasionally with one another, especially me. 

"Like what you see?" He grins. 

"Is it really that obvious?" I chuckle. 

He giggled at my comment and we did our handshake. We created it in first grade, a year after we met, and it just stuck since then. 

"Davy!" I hear someone call.

I turn around and see my girlfriend Amanda approaching me. 

"Hi, baby," I say with the fakest smile in the history of fake smiles. I kissed her. " What's up?"

"Nothing. Just...finished cheer practice and wanted to see you." she smiled. 

"Here I am."

Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She spoke after an uncomfortable pause in the conversation. 

"Yeah."

"Bye, love you."

"Love you, too."

She kissed my cheek and walked off.

"That was painful to watch..." Zay commented, which caused me to laugh. "I'm being serious though. Why are you even dating her if you're gay?"

"I'm not ready to come out to the school." I shrugged. " She's nice though, and easy to talk to."

"That doesn't mean shit. Y'all are awkward as fuck."

"We're only awkward when it comes to 'I love you's and shit." 

"You don't even love her; why say it?"

If only he knew about my fear...

"Oh, shut up, Zayden." I smacked the back of his head. "Let's just go so I can get home and shower."

"You're mean.." he whined, rubbing his head.

I laughed and picked up my bag as he began walking ahead of me. Damn...I can see his thong from under the miniskirt. I know he's dating Jackson but... Zay is really fine. I couldn't help it; I pushed him against the wall and pressed my lips to his. He didn't reciprocate; why would he? He's dating Jackson! But I can't keep denying the way Zayden makes me feel.

"What are you doing to me, Zayden?" I mumbled against his plump and soft lips. 

I moved away from his lips to his neck, kissing his moisturized skin. 

"D-David...s-stop." he groaned.

-Zayden's POV-

Why is he doing this? I mean, it's normal for us to be flirty with each other. But he's crossing several boundaries right now. He knows I'm dating Jackson. But... I won't lie...he is a good kisser... No! I shouldn't be thinking this! It feels wrong. It is wrong. I shouldn't be letting this happen but... I feel frozen, as if I shouldn't move. I'm completely paralyzed as he cotinueed to kiss my jaw and neck. 

Why am I...enjoying this?... But Jackson... No. I-I can't. David is just my friend. Jackson is my boyfriend. Why am I letting him do this?...

 I came back to my senses as I felt his hand traveling downward; I pushed him away. 

"David! What's wrong with you?!" I yelled as I wiped my lips on the back of my hand. 

He looked down in shame. What am I talking about? I let this happen. I could've stopped him, but I didn't. I just cheated on Jackson. Shit. I noticed David begin to dig his nails into his wrists and his eyes fill with tears. That was extremely insensitive of me; I know he hates being yelled at.  I covered my mouth in shock at my outburst. I can't believe I hurt him... Why would I yell at him like that if 'm the one who cheated?... 

I felt a wetness running down my face; I was crying. Damn, I'm so emotional. 

"No. I'm sorry. I-I...I shouldn't have yelled at you like that-"

"Yes! You should've! You're dating Jackson and I just kissed you. Who does that?"

I looked at him. Was I seriously falling for him? No way! It can't be! I'm dating Jackson and he's just my friend! What am I thinking?...

"No. You passed our boundaries but I followed along. I let you kiss me instead of pushing you away. I'm supposed to be loyal to him-"

"You-you are."

"No, I'm not. and you know it."

He nodded as he understood the message I was trying to get across. I may be in a relationship with Jackson, but I still flirt with others, even girls, which I'm not even attracted to. I wear all these...slutty clothes just for the attention. Sure, he gives me the freedom to do so as long as I don't cheat on him. But I know it's not right. So why do I do it?... And the worst part of all is that...I think I'm losing feelings for him. I love him though... At least I-I think I do...

I pulled Dave into a hug; we stayed like that for a while.

"I love you, Dave. But please, don't do that again. I don't want there to be problems between us all."

"I won't. I'm sorry."

"Good. Now, I don't know about you, but I'm hungry. Chipotle time!"

I ran ahead of him as he laughed at my silliness. Glad we could put that behind us... For now...

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Hi! Chapter one is officially out! 

BTW, Zayden and David are both really sensitive and fragile boys who overthink a lot. So, Zayden overthought what David did, making himself feel guilty. 

Also, Zayden is a femboy, in case you didn't catch that. David is only out to his friends, Andy, Jackson, and Zayden. 

Hope you enjoy it! Y'all are in for a wild, wild ride. 

-CORA