Vents About HIM (And Vents In General)

Wednesday April 19 2023 (started about 6:45 still having it as of 9:19)

I had a panic attack today

I was shaking and crying at the dining room table trying to calm myself down. I told him that and he yelled at me. He yelled at me to go and talk to my mom. She helped a lot.

As I was walking up the stairs he says "Stand the fuck up, walk walk walk walk walk open the gate, go talk to your fucking mother." As I'm upstairs I hear "sitting at the table for 30 fucking minutes."

I wasn't able to eat this morning, I didn't get good sleep last night. I feel dysphoric. I hate my body. I can't seem to calm down completely. I'm breathing raggedly. I can't focus on things.

(it's 9:23. I'm going to try to eat. I will update if I do end up eating.)