Once Upon A Time | 김태형

전쟁 • War

Jimin POV

I wasn't scared of anything.

Yet, residing in such close proximity with her did indeed instill fear within me.

I found myself in a state of inner conflict, torn between the desire to wanting our time alone together to be over as quickly as possible, in order to avert any potential misfortune, and the yearning to prolong it.

I find it challenging to control myself and regulate my emotions in her presence. It is effortless to deceive myself when I am not in her company, convincing myself that I do not grieve for her sweet company and tender touch. However, the mere sight of her face is all it takes to realize that the emotions I harbored for her have not dissipated in the slightest, and all thoughts of healing vanish without trace.

That's why it's so dangerous for me to live in this same place with her. I find myself unable to comprehend my own actions, particularly when encountering her. Why did I behave in such a peculiar manner upon encountering her in the kitchen?

I lost all my senses when I heard her talking about her pregnancy, a moment we had long envisioned together. Yet now, she lives this dream with another, and to compound the agony, that other is none other than my own flesh and blood. The prospect of enduring this situation further is a daunting one, and I am uncertain as to how much longer I can survive in this place.

I should have refrained from entering the kitchen, yet her presence exerted a magnetic force upon me. I was powerless to resist her allure.

She was my drug of choice.

I still can't find any sleep at night thinking about possible answers. I'm trying to understand. Why did she played with me when I gave her the love no one else gave?

There was a knock on my door, distracting me from my thoughts.

"Hello, my lovely brother," Jungkook had a bright smile on his face as he stepped into my room and closed the door behind him.

Leaning back on the door with his hands in his pockets, he mustered me from afar.

"What do you want," I groaned, not being in the mood to deal with him today. My mind, already burdened with a multitude of concerns, found no room to entertain Jungkook's presence.

"Is that how you greet your brother?" he queried, his tone laced with a hint of wounded pride. He cast upon me a disappointed gaze, as if attempting to feign offense at my less-than-enthusiastic salutation.

"It's never a good sign if you come into my room, so just tell whatever you want and then leave," Summoning every ounce of energy, I groaned audibly, my weariness evident, as I propelled myself upright from the comforting embrace of my bed, perching precariously on its edge.

Atop my bed stood Jungkook, his gaze piercing through the air, fixated upon me.

"Are you okay?" he inquired, after a long, derisive pause. I rubbed my eyes as I tried to calm my thoughts.

"I'm sorry. I'm fine. Really."

He stood looking at me with no expression. Without uttering a single word, he proceeded to take off his coat, draping it nonchalantly over the backrest of a chair.

And then, in a sudden burst of mirth, his head began to tremble in a rhythmic motion, his laughter reverberating through the room. "Who would have thought that it ends like this? I remember the days when the two of us were just players and party-goers," he exclaimed, his voice tinged with nostalgia.

Without any conscious intention, my gaze inexplicably wandered towards his hands, which were restlessly fidgeting atop my desk. In that moment, he detected my observation and promptly compelled his hands to retreat, pressing his palms firmly against the surface. "Nerves," he confessed, acknowledging the undeniable truth.