Broken Bridges

Chapter 7

                       September 17th, 2020
                                    Harper
I've never really understood self harm or why people do it. They might just like seeing the blood. Maybe they just like the feeling of pain without actually dying. Some people self harm because they think they deserve it. They think that they deserve a punishment for some reason, whether that be something they did or something they didn't do. Some people might self harm and feel nothing at all because they are numb to it, and they do it in hopes of maybe feeling alive again. My heart aches for those people. I hope I'm never one of those people.
                                       ***
Maliyah and I were late to school this morning. Jeremiyah left early for a six am practice, and without his reminder, I missed the bus this morning once again. Maliyah and her mom thankfully picked me up last minute, but that unfortunately resulted in the two of us arriving fifteen minutes after the bell. We walk to first hour and open the door slowly and quietly, being cautious not to cause any disruptions for the rest of the class. The door creaks and everyone looks at us. With all eyes on me, my cheeks flush with red.
" Thanks for joining us, ladies." Mr. Hernandez says, walking over to us and taking the passes from our hands. " Take a seat." We sit at our table and take out our notebooks and begin copying down the notes on the board. Mr. Hernandez's phone rings and he approaches his desk and sees who it is. " It's my wife. I need to take this." He exits the room, and the class is left unsupervised. Chatter spreads among us.
"So how are you and Jeremiyah?" Maliyah questions. Her eyes get so big as if they are ready to suck all the information I have right out of me. Maliyah has always thrived off the drama.
" We're good." I say. A group of boys behind us eavesdrop on our conversation and interrupt.
" Miyah hasn't dumped your ass yet?" He laughs. " Just don't ever touch him. One touch from your fatass and he's squished. You'll kill him. "
I ignore the boys but subconsciously store that comment away. Maliyah and I continue to talk.
" Elaborate on good." Maliyah grins from ear to ear. " Be more specific." I try to put the scramble of words in my head into a sentence.
" Better than I could ever imagine." My heart flutters as I think of him.
" Ew you're cringey." Maliyah's excited expression turns to pretended disgust. She laughs it off as Mr. Hernandez re-enters the room with sudden contrast in his attitude.
"It's time. It's time!" He says to the class as if he's giving himself a pep talk. " The baby is coming. I gotta go!" He runs to his desk, grabs his laptop, bag and coat and exits the room. He gets halfway down the hall before he turns around and returns to the classroom. " Your assignment for today is to read pages fifty five through seventy eight and complete the reading guide that goes along with it. A sub should be here shortly." He says as he peaks his head into the doorframe and then exits again, frantically running down the hall and toward the main office. Not a single person takes out their copy of To Kill A Mockingbird. The class erupts with chatter and laughter as tons of individual side conversations begin.
" I suppose we should start reading right? That's twenty three pages we have to read by tomorrow." Maliyah says, grabbing her book from her backpack. Maliyah is a straight A student and never misses a single assignment. No wonder she's going into the field of law. While she's reading, I pull out my notebook in an attempt to spark some inspiration for my poem I've been writing for my creative writing class. I think about all the things going on with my life. I think about all the pressure I've been under and how nothing really has been good about my life besides Jeremiyah. I try to think about how I could use both these ideas and incorporate them into a piece of poetry. I decide to write two poems, one very different from the other. Each has a completely different tone, and each is crafted completely differently. I write one about the one joy in my life. The one thing that brings me happiness. Jeremiyah Michael Hansen.

He's calm and collected,
but smart and wise.
he captured my attention
with those beautiful eyes.
I love everything about him,
his interests, his family, his friends.
I want to know what makes him happy.
I want to know what makes him sad.
I want to know everything about that boy.
Every time I hear his voice my heart sinks.
Every time his eyes meet mine I'm intrigued.
I still get butterflies when I talk to him.
I just wish I could breathe.
his eyes seem so innocent,
like he wouldn't hurt a fly.
He is so polite to others .
He's such a nice guy .
I love talking to him
and getting to know to him
more and more each day.
That boy is a surprise .
I am deeply grateful that I fell in love
with the boy with the most pretty eyes.