The Ranch at Havenwood

Chapter 2

The door opened before I could get to it; I glared at my brother as he entered without invitation.

"Of course, he called you," I spat angrily, storming away from the entrance. Declan closed the door behind him, saying "Yes, he called me. He's worried about you, and quite honestly, so am I." He walked further into the apartment until he was only a few feet away from me.

"Don't be. I'm fine," I said as I tried to busy myself with folding the laundry that I'd abandoned on the recliner. Anything to keep my focus off the current situation. 

"You are not," said Declan. "You have an opioid problem that you almost gave into, you decided to shoot whiskey when you know you shouldn't, and you still have at least one pill in your pocket that you didn't give to Jace."

My entire body froze, but I quickly forced myself to finish folding the shirt in my hands before turning to speak.

"You're out of your mind big bro," I said.

"Don't try to bullshit with me little brother. I know you too well." He and I locked into a stare down, the same dark blue eyes staring back at each other, neither brother speaking for a time. I'm not sure what he saw in my expression, but Declan's finally softened.

"Empty your pockets, bro. Prove me wrong."

I couldn't do it. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't prove him wrong because he was right. There was still a single pill in my pocket. I'd lied to Jace about not holding onto any more of them, and I couldn't own up to it with my brother, either. I spun away from Declan, my fist punching into the door frame leading into the kitchen, wood cracking at the contact. I leaned my forehead against the now damaged entryway, my eyes clenched tight as I tried to regain control of myself.

"Come on, Blaine. You've made it almost a year. Don't throw that away." I slipped a hand into my pocket, fingering the one remaining pill before pulling it out and staring at it. I honestly don't think I was going to take it; it was more like a security blanket. How could a tiny pill turn a life so completely upside down?

"Blaine," my brother's voice pulled me from my inner monologue. I walked to the half-bath across the hall, dropped the pill in the toilet and flushed it before I could stop myself. My breathing was shaky as I collapsed to the floor, all energy escaping me. I hadn't come this close to letting my demons win since the beginning. I let my head lean against the grey-tiled wall as Declan dropped down beside me.

"Will you talk to me about what's going on?" he asked. I shook my head, still unwilling to make eye-contact. My brother's hand gripped my right shoulder in support. He knew what I couldn't say, but he also knew not to push.

"Then will you please talk to Alanna tomorrow?" He held up a hand as I finally lifted my head to protest the idea of telling my sister-in-law any of this.

"Declan, no."

"She's your therapist, so it'll stay confidential. Either meet with her or I tell Dad that I think something's up."

I shook my head as I ran fingers through my mop of black curls. I'd been given the option of seeing a therapist or talking to Alanna unofficially. Naturally, I'd chosen my sister-in-law because she was the safe bet. Some days I regretted that decision.

"Dad can't know. He'd pull me from the saddle, and we just got four new horses in. I need the saddle time, especially right now. Please," I begged.

Declan sighed, "Okay then. Alanna's first thing in the morning." Incredulous, I stared at him.

"You already told her." He nodded, unashamed. I cursed.

"She was with me when Jace's call came through."

Reluctantly, I gave a small nod, "Okay."

Anything to keep our father from questioning my ability to work.

Declan stood and offered a hand to me. As I stood, his tall frame enveloped my smaller one into a tight embrace. I tensed reflexively before forcing myself to relax into my big brother's hug. I tried to step away from the hug after a minute, but Declan held me tighter and spoke, his voice full of emotion.

"If you start to fall, promise you'll find me. Even if you don't want to talk about it. Just come over. Text me. Something." I sucked in a breath through clenched teeth, unwilling to risk speaking for fear of my voice breaking. Declan had always been my rock until a few weeks before the accident. It'd been a while since we'd shared a moment, but I couldn't afford to break down right now. Instead, I nodded into my brother's shoulder as we held each other for a moment longer. He moved his hand to the back of my head.

"Jace is crashing on your couch after he closes up. No arguing. It's a done deal. I don't want to lose you. Especially to something like this. You're my baby brother, and I love you." Eventually, Declan stepped back. "I'll let Alanna know that you'll meet her at the office in the morning. Love you brother," he said as he walked to the door, both of us ignoring the dampness on the other's cheeks.