Suburban Island VI

Whirl (Settle Thine Debts)

Whirl (Settle Thine Debts)

-Josie and Steven-

"You're really not happy here?" he asked.

"No," I said. "How can any of this be normal to you?"

"It isn't."

"Ha! Could've fooled me."

"We're all just trying to get by."

"Yeah, yeah."

"We really are."

I folded my arms across my chest. He cocked his head to the side.

"So you're going to Hawaii?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Cool. You'll finally get to go to the beach."

"Yeah. Where are you going?"

"I don't know. They'll stick me somewhere."

"Okay."

"Where does that leave us?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... Are we going to be together after this? Or is this it?"

"Do you want the truth?"

"Yeah. Might as well. We're not going to see each other again, are we?"

"We haven't been together for a long time. We've drifted away. When was the last time we spent any time together?"

"I... I... I don't know."

"Exactly."

"So... that's it then? We're breaking up?"

"I'm so sorry."

"Are you though?"

"Only a little."

"Ouch."

"What do you want me to say? It's the truth."

"You couldn't have delivered that gently?"

"Sorry, no."

"Well... Did we have a good thing?"

"We did. But then it just fell apart."

"That's it?"

"Yeah, pretty much." What was there to say?

"That's kind of lame."

"Sorry. That's just how it is."

"Could you stop saying sorry? You're not helping."

"What do you want me to say?"

"Nothing."

"Fine." I didn't get up to leave. Somehow, that didn't feel right. Maybe if I stayed a little bit longer it could truly be over. (I'm not sure why I thought that.) Steve and I didn't talk as we sat there on his couch. So that was it. I don't know what I was expecting. But I just couldn't let this go on any longer. It wouldn't be fair to him. I haven't been in love with him for over a year. To lead him to think otherwise would be cruel. The trees gave me an out. In a way, I'm glad this is happening. I might sound like an asshole but I would be worse if I kept this going on.

However, I am not done yet.

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-Josie and Martin-

"You wanted to see me?" he asked. I didn't say anything at first. He didn't have to say anymore. He moved aside and let her in. I stood in the doorway.

"I didn't lie to you," he said.

"I'm not mad," I said.

"Huh?"

"I mean, I was. But not anymore." I closed the door behind her. "I'm leaving for Hawaii in a few days."

"Oh, you finally get to see the real beach again?"

"Yeah. Where are you going to go?"

"Promise you won't laugh if I tell you?"

"Does it matter anymore?"

"I guess not. I'm going to Australia."

"Is it even around?"

"I don't know. I'm going to try."

"Why?"

"Might as well. The other places keep filling up. Pretty soon, we won't have anywhere left to go. This land is going to be blown up to keep the trees from spreading into Canada and Mexico."

"Wow. That's so cheerful."

"I'm only being realistic."

"Uh-huh."

"What did you come here for?"

"I don't really know."

"You just felt like it?"

"I guess, maybe."

Just like at Steve's house, Martin and I didn't say anything else. What was there to say? I wasn't going to see him again. I didn't think I was going to see any of them again. I guess I had to see Martin again before I left.

"Do you want to stay the night?" he asked. I stared at him.

"Why?" I asked. He shrugged at me.

"I mean, might as well," he said. "When is going to be the next time you stay with me?" I dropped my shoulders.

"Sure," I said. Because he did have a point. We didn't do anything that night. He slept on the floor and I slept in the bed.

I got up in the early hours of the morning and looked down at the floor. I knelt down and kissed him on the forehead.

"Goodbye," I whispered in his ear. I turned and walked out of the door. I didn't like walking home in the quiet and I still don't. This would be the last time I had to do it.

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-Josie-

Mom and I will be going to Hawaii. She showed me the emails and everything. I am quite surprised. She wasn't on her phone for once when she told me. That was the first time I had ever seen her so happy. I think she's just happy to talk to other people again. Good, I guess. I will get to see the beach for real for a change. The beach at Steve's house was good but it lost its appeal over time. It just wasn't the same. Other than that, I didn't really feel anything. Marty did have a point. I didn't say anything to Mom though. I just wanted her to be happy for once. Besides, that could trigger her to talk on that stupid phone again. (She's really going to be talking on the phone when cell phones become useful again.)

Mom and I spent the next few days packing up. Most of our neighbors were already gone. I don't blame them. This neighborhood was dying. Hell, it was already dead. I don't know why we kept hanging on this long.

One evening, Steve and Marty came over to my house. I stared at them at the front door.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"We wanted to help," Marty said. "Is that okay?" I didn't say anything. I just moved aside and let them in. We didn't say anything. We already did that when I came to see them. It was nice to see them again one more time. I don't know what will happen to them, but I wished them well.

One week later, Mom and I boarded the plane toHawaii. No, Steve and Marty weren't there to see me off. I wasn't expecting it.Probably for the best. From there, I don't know what's going to happen. I'mjust happy to be out of that place.