The Fox, Red

106 - The Needed Sacrifice

WARNING: This chapter covers the sensitive topic of suicide. Please, if this is a touchy subject for you, skip this chapter. There will be a reference to it later to fill you in on what happened without deep details.

Morning comes again. I'm up before the sun. I'm up before anyone else. I sit in the library wondering where I need to look. I wonder if keeping the others here is a good idea. I need to work. They've been doing a wonderful job leaving me to myself. They ask questions now and again but I wonder if it would be better to send them back on their way. I can get around if needed. It'll be slower but manageable.

I might send the group back but keep Anne here. She's been a great help with collecting books and keeping notes about which contains what stories. She's been pretty invaluable The others can take the vehicle with them. If time flows differently here, I wonder how, or even if there is a difference, between here and the world beyond the forest.

I'm concluding that there will only be so much I can do here. If I read all these books, if I'm able to absorb all the information that they can share with me, then what will I do? Just head back and continue my work? What would that entail? Magic is already out there. I've made my presence and intentions well known. The next step would be working on setting boundaries.

As much as I want this information to be shared and magic to be practiced, there are still issues with those who will undoubtedly use it inappropriately. There's also my own self-preservation. I've upset a lot of people who I have no doubt will try to come after me. That will need to be dealt with as well. Everything just needs to be taken one step at a time.

I have no sense of time when I sit down in this library. The sun comes up without me noticing it. Life just goes on without me until Anne comes in and snaps me out of it. " Are you taking care of yourself?"

"I am, thank you."

She is very brief as she knows I'm busy. Maybe not busy. More like engrossed in an activity. There are just so many of these books that are just calling for me. They seem to quell down once I go through them. It's almost like they go back to sleep. My eyes burn as I've been focused on the fine print for too long. I leave the library to find the others sitting at the large table in the main hall beyond the room with the tapestries. I take a seat as they all get quiet.

Any other time I would ask that they continue but for once, I need their attention. "I have come to the decision that I will send the group back. Without me. Anne will stay here and continue to assist me with the library." The rats all seem offended that she gets to stay while they are sent back. I relieve this quickly before they act out, "Your work is better suited for the world out there. Spread the word and get people interested. We've spent so much time here that I don't know what's going on in the world beyond these walls. I'm sure there are people out there who need your assistance more than I do."

They seem to relax. They're still uneasy but I know how to work them over. I reach over grabbing one of their gnarly paws, "You have to trust me on this. I will be back. Just look for the signs." His eyes widen at this personal connection. The others feel the same excitement. All of them nod with vigorous energy. "We will serve you as best we can!"

"I know you will. Take the vehicle back with you. Anne and I will be fine here."

They understand their orders. It's not more than an hour and the entire place goes silent. They left on foot where we had to leave the car. Once they're out of sight, Anne and I return to the castle. It's just the two of us here. It's quiet.

My mind is focused on one thing. Getting that last tail. Sacrifice. A word with a specific meaning on paper but such a wide interpretation when thrown out into the real world. Anne stands at the ready to assist in any way that she can. In any way that she can...