hate me - eren jaeger [DISCONTINUED]

18

The crippled soldier sits on the bench again. I hadn't come in for a few days, afraid of what I'd come to know by showing him my family.

I take a seat beside him and silently hand him my sketchbook, opened to the pages of my family. He peers down at me, then at the intricate charcoal art work.

"I'm sorry for your loss," is all he says after a few moments of silence, keeping the book in his hand. "Your father, he took bullets for me me at one point," he explains. "Truly, a noble man. And your sisters, they stuck in the trenches... But I did not see them make it out."

I don't cry. I don't move, afraid that I'll mess up time and space and take another person's life. "And my mother?"

He shrugs, "there was word of an Eldian Restorationist following in Dina Fritz' footsteps, trying to create a legacy. But no, I did not see her."

I sigh, I've had too many panic attacks to have another one now. I already knew, deep down, that my family is gone. And yet, I had hope. All it did was make me more disappointed than I already was.

"You're very skilled," he muses, and I realize he has flipped to a different page. Eren's burning eyes stare back at me from the page, and I snatch the book from his frail hands.

"That's private, it's not very nice to go through someone's things without their permission," I close the book, holding it against my chest.

He gazes down at me, emotionless, with that dead eye. "Apologies, miss."

"What's your name?" I ask after getting up to leave, ignoring his empty apology.

"Kruger."

Kruger is an odd man, indeed. Poor thing, war left him mentally deranged.

Reiner still has not returned home since our latest ordeal. I have not eaten since then.

A knock on the door resounds and I open the door, expecting Reiner. It is Gabi.

She holds a plastic container in her hands and holds it up to me. "Reiner sent this," she says. "He says to eat if you wanna be strong."

I take the container from her and invite her in. She continues talking about other things Reiner says. Inside the container is a serving of spaghetti. I put it on the shelf and talk to Gabi until she gets tired and leaves.

Her conversations only consist of how great Marley is and how bad Paradis is and how she can't wait to take the Armoured Titan. Hearing the words from a child's mouth will never not be disturbing, I realize.

Just when I thought things were getting normal, they started going downhill again. I wanted to make the most of life before the Rumbling began, since there's no way I'll survive that.

But, of course, there's always hiccups in the road.

Reiner is sitting on his couch, a rifle propped up in his hand. The lights are dim and I squint my eyes to look through the little opening in his living room curtains.