•𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓝𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓶𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓳𝓮𝓬𝓽 • 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐥

Chapter 4

"I can tell you what it feels like to lose your home on a cold night."

An apartment, cold and lonely, a single body on a chair. A video, playing from a device he couldn't quite grasp how to use yet. In the video he could see himself, his friends, the troops he worked in. The voice of a man droning on in the background, going on and on about his bravery, and the war he fought. The papers on the table in front of him, with the faces of his friends, most of them deceased. Peggy Carter, retired, he read. Her adress and phone number were listed as well and, for a moment, he thought to call her, but refrained. He kept reading. Howard Stark, deceased. Howard's son, affiliated with the people who provided the aparment, looked like he was doing doing pretty well for himself, kidnapped and all.

How come everyone kept going, yet he was still here?

Steve, having not moved much all day, decided to walk around the neighbourhood. For now, the apartment S.H.I.E.L.D. had provided was in the heart of New York City. With its bustling night life, the noise did not allow for his augmented hearing to ever have a rest. Not like he had been sleeping much, anyways.

He moved through the throngs of people with no clear destiny in mind. Only a few steps out the door and he couldn't help but wonder at how things had changed. He found an outdoor café and sat down, taking his little notebook out to sketch. With not much else in view, he started sketching the biggest building he could see. A waitress approached.

"You here to see the big guy?," she asked with a smile.

"Ma'am?"

"Ironman? Most of our patrons come here just for a chance to see him fly by," she responded.

With nothing else to say, Steve limited himself to answering: "Maybe another day," and stood up, pocketing his sketchbook.

The girl looked a little crest-fallen at that, but nodded and wished him a good day. With nothing to do once more, Steve decided to head to the local library and see if he could find himself a nice book. When he got there, he nodded to the old man at the front desk and started looking around the shelves.

The Lord of the Rings, he saw, letting a small, sad smile curl up at the corners of his lips. Bucky would've been so happy. He grabbed the book and headed to a little corner so he could read. After a while, Steve felt the skin on his neck prickle with the distinct feeling of being watched. He heard a small snort.

"I was starting to wonder how much longer it would take for you to notice," the voice said. It sounded like a girl, and a relatively young one at that.

"Who are you?," Steve asked, not yet dropping his guard at the prospect of an attack.

A girl with long, red hair walked out from behind a bookshelf, her lips curled in a smile. Her skin was tanned and freckled. She looked young.

"Hello, Steve. My name is Kai Jones. I oversaw your thawing process," she responded.

"I didn't know S.H.I.E.L.D employed children," Steve answered back.

"I'd love to say they don't, but I'd risk being wrong," she grinned, sitting on the floor before him. "Just in case you were wondering, the organization is not tracking you. I just like coming to the library on Saturdays."

"Just like any normal kid would," Steve nodded sarcastically.

"Well, I'm not just any normal kid. Anyways, I just wanted to ask, how're things?," Kai asked.

"As well as can be. Listen kid, I just wanted to walk around. I'm not really in the mood for social interactions," Steve said, already standing up when Kai beat him to it.

"Yes, of course, sorry to bother you, sir. I truly just wanted to see how you were doing," Kai said, turning around, when she sudenly stopped. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry. I know what it feels like to lose years of you life, and come back to the people you love being gone".

Kai gave a step forward when Steve's voice stopped her.

"You do?," his voice cracked. Kai turned around.

"Yes, just not for nearly as long," she responded. "The place I come from, the things I've seen, the time I've lost are all things that haunt me every day. I can't go back, and I can't undo the things I've done. For now, I can only try to enjoy the little childhood I've got left, and try to make up for what I've done."

"You sound like you have a lot of baggage," Steve mentioned, shrinking in on himself.

"Don't we all?" She turned around once more. "Do what you can with what you have now. The past is gone, you can't run from it and chase after it at the same time."

With that, Kai left. When Steve looked back at the book in his hands, he saw a phone number written on the corner of one the pages he had been looking at. Steve added the contact ito his phone, pocketing it afterwards. He sat back down, a little shaken from his meeting with Kai.He kept reading, letting the hours wash over him, until nighttime, when he headed back to the apartment.

Steve Rogers was a man displaced, with no home, no family, but Steve Rogers was known for a lot of things, and giving up was not one them.