I came to my senses quickly enough, because Aurelius Titus's eldest offspring accompanied him. If Aurelius was as dutiful a husband as he was a son, his daughter should be around eleven, born exactly ten months after her parents' wedding.
She was nearly a bride herself now, and very aware of it. Unlike her father, the girl dressed to the nines to greet the guests. A pleated gown, a stole and a silver rope hang with amethysts around her neck. The same purple stones decorated her ears peeking from under a braided mass of hair. The only concession to girlhood I spotted were purple petals stuck to her nails. The rest—hair, composure, the way she assessed and dismissed me—was that of a woman. She reminded me of a very specific woman too, and so much so, that I suppressed a shiver.
Aurelius Titus visibly struggled to compose himself after discovering me on his doorstep. I doubted he heard a word of Rufius Fulgentius' excuses for our impromptu visit.
"I implore you to hear me out, illustrious Aurelius Titus," I said, before Aurelius could throw us out. "I wouldn't have come to you, if it wasn't of the utmost importance."
Aurelius Titus frowned for another moment, then sighed. "Very well."
"In private," I insisted, meeting his eyes. I kept my gaze as steady as I would in the arena. "It wouldn't take long."
It used to be that even the long winter nights weren't long enough for us... but Aurelius Titus also surrendered faster than in our youth. He apologized to Rufius Fulgentius that the lady of the house was indisposed, sent his daughter away—'we will finish the translation tomorrow'—and invited me to his library.
The library! My heart quivered. That was how the affair had started between us. Aurelius Titus would read a page to me, something unexpected. Then we talked. No matter what I said back then, even if it was ignorant, stupid or rushed, he listened. He made me feel cherished like nobody else in the world.
It didn't occur to me until much later that Aurelius Titus simply needed to talk things over when he worked, and that his veiled gaze was turned inward, listening to the thoughts that I sparked in his mind, rather than to me.
Which probably explained the withering glance his daughter shot me before her departure. Her sandals drummed furiously as she left, but her back was impeccably straight, her head held high. Chances are, Aurelius Titus kept his habits, and the girl was as oblivious as I used to be.
"Isn't she Alina born again!" I exclaimed in wonder.
"In her case, nurture was powerless before nature," Aurelius Titus said. His etched lips twisted in distaste.
"Do you still hate your sister?"
He harrumphed. "Did you really make the journey to ask this?"
"Believe me, I would have avoided coming to you if I could." Maybe my quest wasn't as hopeless as I had imagined. I wetted my lips and looked around to gather my thoughts.
Aurelius' library was vast, with rows of shelves to store books and scrolls. Marble busts of the philosophers stared at me from between the papers, but he didn't have a single bust of Marcus Caelius or Claudius Caesar. Three writing desks occupied the rest of the space, one of them piled with an ancient treatise. I sat down and leafed through it. Aurelius Titus' handwriting mixed with pages in less confident penmanship. "Your current work?"
"Yes," he replied and positioned himself by the window, arms crossed on his chest. "It will become the history of our age, if I am left in peace."
"Sorry," I said, "I'll be brief."
I tried. I really tried, but old habits die hard. Despite everything, I enjoyed talking with him; it put the jumbled mess of my thoughts in order. Plus, Victor and his fate, Claudius' victories, and Messalina's plotting naturally made for a very long tale.
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Champion in Love (bxb)
General Fiction|| A Gladiator's Queer Star-Crossed Love Story|| *** The former Champion of Champions gladiator seizes a chance to forge the next prodigy of the arena, but when his bull-headed student and would-be-lover proves to be a hardcore enemy of the Empire...