Note: This was posted very late (early?), so I'll go over this chapter to edit soon. If you see any errors, please tell me in the comments! Thank you. <3
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You know how those peppery romance novels begin: a female protagonist wakes up, has the best leg-trembling stretch and bounces around at 5am to make toast (and eggs, arguably) for breakfast before first day of school. Sound familiar?
But, that's not how reality works, unfortunately.
Instead of doing anything productive, you opted to scroll mindlessly through YouTube Shorts and daydream about getting dressed. You briefly considered how muscular your thumbs must be. With all the scrolling you'd been up to, it'd be strange for them not to be. Anywho, it's not like you had any obligations today. You just felt bad for yourself, is all. Nothing wrong with a few feelings of self-resentment. Sadly, vegetation can only last so long.
A knock to your apartment door echoed out and you heard shuffling feet in the hallway. Momentarily cringing at the thought of anyone seeing you in your loungewear getup, you rolled your eyes back to the glaring screen of your phone. Maybe they'll just leave. Your fingers scurried across the screen once again.
Open social media — any one. It didn't matter at this point.
Scroll. See something mildly entertaining. Double tap.
Scroll. See something mildly infuriating. Remove from recommendations.
Scroll. See an attractive person. Ogle and look through their profile.
Go back to the "For You" page.
Scroll. Someone's knocking at the door.
Scroll. Knocking? At the door? Double tap.
Scroll. Blink. Which door? Double tap.
Someone's still at the door.
Dissociation? Broken.
They didn't leave. You grumbled and drop the phone to land on the couch. Your fingers brushed along your scalp in aggravation. Though, standing up was arguably the worst part of your day. Joints you weren't aware existed sounded out like Pop Rock candies jumping around as you forced yourself to stand. Nothing to cry home about really, just a few future joint replacements. At least you knew what to start saving for after escaping heaps of student loans, you frown.
A louder "bang!" rang out from the door. Having startled you enough to tense up and leap back with wide eyes, you recovered quickly with a scowl and spat out, "I'll be there in a fucking minute!" A flurry of rapts on your door made you grind your teeth together. Whoever this person was at your doorstep had less patience than a sad cuckholded husband. Grimacing, you padded your way to the door.
The last thing your day needed was an irritating salesperson. The only currency you'd give them would be a trip to the hospital. See how they'd deal with a bunch of money being snatched from their pockets. Maybe you'd be nice and spare them a new set of teeth if they'd be oh-so inclined. But you doubted a salesperson would be that annoying. Probably wouldn't work well in their favour, either — so maybe it was a kid or two?
The knocking became louder and you practically jog to the door, trying your best to not glide into the damn thing. Socks were a bad call. Fumbling with the lock a bit, you wasted no time to throw open the door. Anger flowed through your body for a fleeting moment when you don't see anyone. But the burning feeling dissipated when your gaze dropped to the floor. Your mouth opened, and you stalled momentarily, before your lips pressed shut. Whoever you'd expected it to be, they were certainly not this. Whatever "this" was, definitely couldn't have knocked for themselves.
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