Naruto AU: The Untold Story

Chapter 30: Selfish Desires

Hours later, the sun was starting its slow descent in the sky casting the village in orange, red, and yellow. Long shadows stretched throughout the village and a gentle breeze blew threw the trees. A single young Kunoichi sat alone on top of a hill that overlooked the entire village, a brown leather bag sat forgotten beside her as a scroll lay open in front of her. The words scribbled in the paper told a very dark, and sad tale of a people who had lost everything. Including their lives.

It took most of the day for Hisako to gather the strength to even open the scroll. Screw dinner. Screw training. Screw whatever other plans she may have had that day. Even if she was supposed to train with Neji this afternoon at the Hyuga Estate. Yeah. She blew him off too. After a long time of idly staring at the scroll, not finding the courage to actually pick it up and read it, she stood up again and began pacing in front of the scroll.

This has been the pattern she's fallen into. Well, at first she had spent the majority of the time crying. Alone. Which is exactly what she wanted. She didn't want anyone to see her like this. Vulnerable and scared. She kept going over the events that had occurred, and then she went over what she had said in the hospital room. The last thing she said to Akio, even though he had already died.

What if I want the Glacier Village to stay dead?

It was such a horrible thing to say. Such a horrible realization for her to have of herself. The moment she met a survivor of the Glacier Village, sure, she was thrilled, excited, and couldn't believe it! There was another survivor! She wasn't sure how he survived, but he did. And he traveled all this way for a message for her. But then, as the realization hit that if he survived if even she was able to survive then there had to be more survivors, a sort of selfish seed planted itself in her heart.

A dark, horrible desire that Hisako was terrified to admit, terrified to acknowledge, sprouted ugly roots inside of her very soul.

How selfish did she have to be to wish an entire village dead just so she didn't have to face a destiny she didn't want to have any part of? How selfish did she have to be to say those words out loud? To a dead man no less. A dead man who traveled from who knows how far, to give Hisako a story. His last act was to deliver this message. To tell her that there could be more survivors out there, and she had to be selfish enough to say those words.

She was absolutely disgusted with herself.

But, a small part of her realized that she had to recognize the darkness that resided within her. Every human had these dark emotions. She was not immune to them. The best she could do was accept these emotions, try to repress them, and move on with her life. But, in order to move on with her life, she had to sit down and read this scroll. The story that it held within it.

She sat down again, her eyes gazing over the scroll and the words written on there. Her expression was sour as she pursed her lips together planting both hands firmly on either side of the scroll as she leaned over it. Her vision blurred again, she felt her heart racing and sweat beaded her forehead and the back of her neck as her breathing got shallow.

She bit back a scream of frustration as she stood up and began pacing again. At this rate, she would never gather the courage she needed to read this scroll. She was a coward. And her thoughts began drifting that way again, this wasn't the first time her mind has done this to her today.

She wanted to rip out her hair in frustration.

"I have to read this damned scroll!" Hisako shouted up to the sky, to no one but herself and the birds and wildlife that listened, "I'm going to read it, now!"

Hisako sat back down in front of the scroll with a huff. This time, she grabbed the scroll, holding it up in front of her, and took a deep breath as she began finally reading the words. Her mind actually processed what she was reading this time.