If I told you how I feel you'd probably leave. Probably taking my heart just to deceive me, maybe even mislead me. Making me feel special and preaching that you'd never leave me. But now that you know my side, how do you feel? I feel hopeless and confused. What am I? An open book with filled pages; used and only opened when a reference is needed. My hope, plotting for a climax which never leads to the rising action. So, you continue to fall, for there's no reply and sometimes no book at all.
I've been hurt so many times. Putting my neck on the limb, for people like you all my life. People that couldn't even see a future with me. Yet for some reason I still maintain a smile that sings a tone of happiness. Even though it's a cover for true sadness. I continue to talk delicacies into light. "He could still be the one." "Maybe it was a one and done situation." So, I shine even when light won't shine upon me. Even though I cry so hard sometimes my head hurts.
I continuously fear I'm not who you want me to be. Maybe you're truly disappointed in who I am or who you've figured I've become. While I'm still processing and becoming do not fear for, I've yet to find my calling. That so called everyday wakening purpose or place on earth. As of now I float and floating brings me happiness. The excitement of never knowing where or who is next.
