운명

Telepathy

비록 지금은 멀어졌어도
우리 마음만은 똑같잖아
내 곁에 네가 없어도, 예
네 곁에 내가 없어도, 예
[Even though we're far away now //
Only our hearts are the same //
Even without you by my side //
Even if I'm not by your side]

Jungkook stares at his computer screen. He's not sure yet, but this might just be the final cut of his portfolio video.

At first, he couldn't get it to work. The transitions felt too jarring. The music felt off. The music and the video didn't go well with his message. He no longer knew what his message was after all the editing, buried under all the efforts of making it artistic and fancy.

But he kept at it, until he felt all the stransitions were smooth, transporting the viewer between the fish market and the dance studio seamlessly. Hoseok would be kneeling to pick up a fish bucket in one scene, then standing up into a pirouette the next. Alone in the studio in one frame, then walking through Jagalchi in an instant. The movement flowed through every change in frame. And even though they were trying to show filial piety, and the song is about romantic love, the message rings the same: neomu apeun sarangeun sarangi anieosseumeul. It's not love if it hurts too much. It becomes a sad thing, a burden, and love should never be a burden.

Then again, what would Jungkook know about love?

He plays the file one more time, and finds the ending lacking. He looks away from his computer monitor, at the calendar sitting at the corner of his desk. His CSATs are tomorrow, as well as the first anniversary of his brother's passing.

Nibbling his lower lip, Jungkook draws up a black screen then types out a line of text:

Neomu salanghaessdeon Jeon Junghyuneul wihae

For Jeon Junghyun, who loved too much.

He wonders if it's too on the nose, but saves the file in any case. Before he can second-guess himself, he sends it to his first audiences.

Jungkook shuts off his computer, opting to turn in early instead of forcing any more last-minute CSAT preparations. He has to wake up early to leave the house to make it to his test site on time.  He's not the type to sleep early. Often lost in his thoughts about the day, or about random things, he's up till the wee hours of morning, only to be sleepy by midday. Tonight, he has to force himself to make it through the hours-long CSAT without falling asleep midway.

He gets ready for bed and climbs under the sheets when his phone buzzes on his nightstand. Namjoon is on the other line.

"Namjoon hyung," Jungkook answers.

"Hey, Jungkook," he says. "I know you're probably off to bed for your CSAT tomorrow, and I wish you all the best of luck, really..." He pauses, as though looking for the right words. "But I just want to say any art school that says no to this video is seriously going to miss out."

Jungkook feels himself blush. "Thank you, hyung," he says, flustered by the compliment.

"No, really, I mean... I don't even really have the words? I'm not sure how to express the emotions I felt while I was watching, and after watching it. I had to watch it more than once, actually... It was kinda haunting, and moving, and I wanted more.

"I wanted the whole story," he says. "You know how I said I liked getting into the headspace of the artist? Well, this headspace was dark and heavy, and it felt... wrong and intrusive to want to know more. But I do want to know more. This is amazing. The dancer, too, and the singer. All of it, amazing."

Jungkook releases the breath he hadn't realized he's been holding. It's not an official evaluation or anything, but he respects Namjoon and knows to hold his opinion with high regard. A good review is a good review, but better since it's Namjoon.