Two sided(A.I)

Letter 4 - em

I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted

I thought about our last kiss, how it felt, the way you tasted

And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine

Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you?

When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you?

Sometimes I start to wonder, was it just a lie?

If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all

I remember the day you told me you were leaving

I remember the make-up running down your face

And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them

Like every single wish we ever made

I wish that I could wake up with amnesia

And forget about the stupid little things

Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you

And the memories I never can escape

'Cause I'm not fine at all

I started writing this song when you left . I don't know what to say in a letter finding this out now but if you were here with me know I would hug you and hold you and never let you go . When you left I was upset and it drove me to do stupid things , crazy things and I kept having nightmares something bad happened and know I know that that is the truth . cancer sucks but .. ya I don't know what to say.

Thank you for the gifts ! I love them . the batman Bennie was adorable and the gift card with a Mayday parade top was great . why did you get me all these things ? I have things to give you but I don't know how . I haven't heard from you or your family and it worries me . I need to call your mom . I can't take this anymore . it kills me everyday . these letters hurt me , knowing I'm not with you now .

-Em