COGNITION OF SOUL| Taehyung| KTH FF

09| BUZZ WITH BOOZE

"I do not need your approval darling, that's for insecure people."

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As I got ready for the party, I wondered if I'd made a good decision. It was too late to second-guess myself, but I already knew that Soomin and her friends didn't have that much in common with me. I didn't like to shop or gossip. I liked to read and loved to listen to a good DJ set.

Every once in a while, I'd convince Jae to take me to a club and we'd dance all night. I wore something to cover most of my skin, and Jae kept people away from me. It was one of my favorite things. Not like they had much of that around here and Jae would be leaving next week, but still, Soomin and I just didn't see eye to eye on music. Which might not seem like a big thing, but it was most likely the beginning of a fatal flaw in our relationship.

I'd bitten my nails down to the quick. When Jae saw me gnawing on my fingers, he offered to tag along with me, but I couldn't-wouldn't-let him do that. He was leaving soon. I had to do this on my own. But I was keeping my cell in my pocket just in case I needed backup.

By eight, Soomin was waiting for me outside. Her crooked smile spelled mischief as I closed the door to her little silver Honda. Her red hair hung halfway down her back in perfect curls. "You ready?" she asked.

Nope. Not at all. "Totally."

Soomin's country music filled the silence as she drove through the winding streets. I tried to tune it out, but the singer whining about losing some lame boyfriend was like needles digging in my eardrums.

"This song is great," I said, my lame attempt at trying to start a conversation.

"I know, right? It's one of my faves." She turned it up.

Thankfully, only a few minutes passed before she pulled into a packed driveway and parked. "Nervous?" she said.

I wondered if the gleam in her eye meant that she was hoping I was nervous. "I'm more curious than anything."

"It'll be fun. Plus, it's Nongong. We're all nice," she lifted one shoulder, "for the most part."

Yeah, I wasn't buying that one. I had a feeling that if I got on Soomin's bad side, she would become a huge pain in my ass. Though I wasn't afraid of her so called wrath but I did not need more crap on my plate right now.

She grabbed her purse and pulled out a glittery tube of lip-gloss. "Here. Try this one."

Oh God. That was a terrible idea, but one I couldn't refuse without being rude. Again I had no problem being rude but I wanted to have a good school year.

"Thanks." I took the tube from her, and with a shaking hand, started to apply the gloss in the vanity mirror.

Short, staggering visions popped through my mind of the different places she used the gloss.

In a bathroom. In her car. In English class. In Jung-ho's car.

And then she was at a pharmacy. She looked around as her pulse pounded. The coast was clear. She put the gloss in her pocket as she walked down the aisle, toward the exit. Her fear and excitement filled me.

And then I was back in her car. I pulled the tube from my lips. Soomin was texting and hadn't noticed a thing.

I exhaled slowly and focused on my reflection. The gloss was slimy and sticky, but it made my lips look cotton plump. My eyes were lined in my favorite midnight shadow, making their brown look richer.