6:25 A.M; No Jitters!: It was very early, and the sun was just rising over the horizon, and illuminated the sky with it's red rays. Today was the day of the acoustic concert, and everyone already knew how to deal with all of the anxiety of the upcoming event. Tim had managed to get some sleep, unlike the previous night. No questions had coursed through his mind, but he thought of Johannes. He thought about how he told him he didn't love him, a certain way. He didn't know exactly what that way was. He did love him, but like a brother. A very close brother. And that brother tried to kiss him. Just three eight hours ago. Everyone had been awake for a couple of hours, already had their coffee, and gotten dressed for the concert. It didn't start for a couple more hours, until after 5 PM. That was the time that they needed to worry about performance. But that would be later on, it was time to enjoy Venice Beach, California.
Tim, sitting on his bed, had been staring at Johannes, who was lost in his phone, somewhere online. He continued to stare at him, getting his 'I Really Do Love You' Speech ready. He didn't know how to word it correctly, in a way he would understand him. But, he lived the YOLO life, so he would just tell him one thing at a time and hope for the best. He stood from the bed, and sat next to Johannes. He put his phone down when he felt Tim's body heat contrasting with his own. Their faces bore no emotion, and there was this heavy atmosphere around them.
"Hi, Johannes." He said it timidly, quietly. He really felt timid and like he deserved to be hidden away.
"Is there something you want to tell me, Tim?" He said it as if he were agitated- done- with him. Tim heard it in his tone. Johannes really didn't want to talk to him, and he understood that. Johannes poured his own heart, his mind, his very soul, out to him. And what did Tim do? He shut him away, like everything he said meant nothing to him.
"Yes, Johannes. I love you." He said it in an equally irritated tone. A sense of relief washed over Tim, as well as a small feeling of regret in his chest. He wanted this to be a passionate moment, of pure love. But instead, it came off as a competition to see who could be more pissed off at one another. He took in a deep breath before he said anything else."I love you, Johannes." He said it in a quieter tone, to come off as a friend, not a threat. Tim placed his hand on Johannes' cheek and brushed his hair from out of his face.
"The same way... I love you?" He returned the gesture, placing his cold hand on Tim's cheek. He stiffened at the temperature of his hand.
"I love you in each and every way." He kissed him on his cheek with that. Johannes kissed his shoulder in response. They both wrapped their arms around each other, and pulled one another into a hug. Tim kissed Johannes' chest. They stayed like this for a while before Tim broke them apart. Tim wanted to kiss him so desperately, but he had to fight that feeling. He wanted to wait a while before that point. Johannes wanted it right then and there. Tim could see it in his eyes. They were dark with a certain lust and they made the rest of his face dark along with them. Tim felt the pressure of the moment and allowed the moment to take over. He closed his eyes and let what would happen, happen, whether he wanted it right there, or not. Johannes was right there, directly in front of him, their lips touching. Tim kissed him back, the passion of the moment taking control over him. Johannes' hands were on him in an instant, his back being the easiest target. Tim leaned forward, almost as if he wanted to lie on top of him. They both took a break, to fill their lungs with the much needed oxygen. ".. I love you.." It was the only thing he could say at the time. He felt a longing feeling in his stomach, almost like he needed something. That thing was Johannes. He wrapped his arms around the black haired man and listened to his steady heartbeat through his own pounding pulse in his ears.
".. I love you.." Johannes kissed Tim's brown hair.
"You really meant what you said yesterday, in the break room." He said it monotonous and blankly.
"Of course, I did. And I don't regret a single word I said."
2:20 P.M: Henrik had seen Tim in the room and felt compelled to talk to him.
"Hey, Tim. How are you?" He sat next to him on the bed. The crooked smile he knew so well was as big as it has ever been.
"I'm fine, Henrik." He had an equally big smile, and it let Henrik have peace of mind that his friend was now over with his negative emotions.
"How are you and Johannes' relationship? Are the waters.. clear?" He asked it, just to make sure that everything was okay within the band. Tim gave another smile, with a chuckle, assuring that the 'waters were clear', and there was no reason to be worried.
"Yes, Johannes and I are fine." He was actually amazed that one thing could go from a small touch on the crotch to a full on debate if one another loved each other. How did this whole controversy start? All Tim knew was he accidentally touch Johannes' groin, Johannes did some thinking, and now he loves him? It seemed pretty confusing, but he didn't know the fine details, even though, he was part of the whole situation. Johannes is a very confusing person, but he loved him, no matter what he was like.
YOU ARE READING
Jag Älskar Dig Inte (I Don't Love You)
Short StoryJohannes gave Tim every thing he wanted, for that while. When they kissed on the stage, all of what they had went down the drain, and they were left with the bitterness which hit them both where it hurt the most. The cold looks, the insulting names...
