Essence of Purity [boyxboy]

Chapter XXX

~Sunday 6th June 2010~

Mourn grumbled in his sleep. It happened a lot, Salem simply hadn't had the time to notice it before. There were never real words, nothing other than indiscernible sounds, cute little mutters that made Salem smile. Sometimes, he was quiet for hours, other times he chattered away in that barely audible fashion. Salem listened out when he did, trying to pick out the words, looking for vowel sounds or anything else that might lead him to understand what was on Mourn's mind. In the end, he never understood any of it.

Like Uttam had said, Mourn was having a bad day. It made sense, he hadn't started any sort of treatment yet, he was still suffering through the episode that had brought his condition to light. It wasn't going to all clear up after a few extra hours of sleep. It was eleven o'clock and Mourn had been sleeping since around three the previous morning. It didn't look like he would wake up any time soon, not with the way that Uttam had described the episodes in his treatment plan. There would be days when Mourn would sleep for twenty-three hours, when Salem would have to forcibly wake him to make sure he had enough fluids and something to eat. Then there would be days like normal, when Mourn would feel like nothing had changed. Those seemed like nothing more than a dream at the moment.

Salem couldn't imagine Mourn's frustrations. Especially given that the obvious cause for his condition was his work. He had done this to himself. It wasn't a fluke, it wasn't dumb luck - Mourn's own career was a direct factor. Salem didn't want the elf to blame himself but he wasn't sure there was much he could say to change that either. It was just the way their lives were now. Salem would adjust in the same way that Mourn would. It might not take him as long to accept those changes but, in the end, they would both get to a safe space. Some place comfortable, some place like it was before the diagnosis.

Salem didn't mind the quiet. He sat with Mourn, back resting against the headboard and legs outstretched with the elf slumbering beside him. He had been sat there for the last two hours, since he had woken up irritatingly earlier than usual. Breakfast had been brought to them, requested by Salem the previous night, and he made sure to keep Mourn awake long enough to actually eat something. Since then, the elf had been asleep. And Salem had kept him company.

There was a TV in Mourn's bedroom, mounted on the wall opposite the bed, so that at least staved off total silence. Salem kept the volume low despite how heavily Mourn apparently slept in these new episodes. He watched game shows, glancing up from his crocheting occasionally when he couldn't think of the right answer to the question being asked. There was a notepad to his right, resting on the bedside table, covered in rushed scrawlings. Making notes made sense. Uttam had said the treatment plan was a mere skeleton of what it should be, that it would have to be tailored to Mourn specifically. Salem was possibly taking that notion a tad too far.

There were crude tables of Mourn's pulse, of how many breaths he took, on average, over a period of a few minutes, even his temperature. Salem checked every hour on the hour, adding to his results. Maybe it would be unimportant. Maybe Uttam would tell him that those factors had no play in how Mourn would learn to cope with his triggers and episodes. Or maybe they were vital. Regardless, Salem kept up his little observations. It wasn't like they were hard to take.

Salem smiled to himself as he tied off the end of another crocheted cactus, adding it to the pile of succulents in his lap that he had been working on since he woke up. The book he was working through called for seven of the varied little cacti, so two more to go. He glanced toward Mourn, half hoping he might have woken then so Salem could show him his work. His eyes were still closed. The smile soured ever so slightly, loneliness prickling through Salem's chest.

He would get over it.

Salem could show Mourn his progress in a day or two, when he was more alert and the episode would hopefully be tapering off. The project would be finished then, with the little cacti all stuffed and arranged correctly in the crocheted pot that Salem had yet to start work on. That was a better plan. Something for Salem to look forward to, something to make Mourn smile after such a gruelling few days for him. Salem nodded silently to himself, turning the page casually, wondering what he would work on after the succulents. A little frog stared back at him, lime green with bright red eyes. Salem grinned, childish and thankfully unseen by his slumbering boyfriend. The frog was next and that was settled without question.