Intertwined

Chapter Six

 I hadn't spent a single moment over the weekend not fretting over the end of my newest friendships, the one with Lyall in particular. I didn't let myself hope either. By Monday morning I could tell Lyall didn't have the intention of speaking to me. He had completely cut me out. I wouldn't have noticed it if he didn't give up his seat and role as my tutor. He was the first to leave the classroom and the first to ignore me. I played my own role to a tee. I was as ignorant as was originally planned. Lyall's glances, the yearning look from Erica, and Marleene's almost grateful acceptance didn't bother me. Or at least, I didn't show that it bothered me.

The passing days didn't do much to settle my nerves. People still gawked at me when I wandered from class to class... alone. Only two seconds with Lyall and now I was the source of gossip. I swore I heard a chalky red-headed girl in my fourth-hour History class whisper something about Lyall screwing me and then moving on. I assumed that was why Mattias still watched me with hate-filled eyes. Great, one problem was replaced with another. Not only was I going to be labeled as a slut, but the second most dangerous person at the school thinks I slept with his ex-boyfriend.

Despite my efforts, my body was always–and I mean always–conscious of Lyall's whereabouts. In math, it wasn't that I knew where he sat, the feeling was more real than that. It was as if his presence in the room left physical indicators on my body. From whichever direction he was in, my skin on that side raised in heat. Even in the hallways, the flaming would spike up, warming the back of my scalp and arms if he had so much as turned the corner behind me. An obsession in the making. Regardless, my wondering eyes would find his face and I'd be left aching. His once glowing face and exuberant mood were replaced with stoic emptiness.

On the brighter side, we started the volleyball unit in gym class. With my prior acquaintance with the sport, I had done fairly well and found that I enjoyed going to that class. It was the perfect way to ignore the world around me if only for fifty minutes a day. Coach Beyers came up to me before the start of class.

"You seem to know what you're doing, er, Em, right," he fumbled.

"Em, yes."

"Did you play on a team at your old school or just a pass-time player?"

"I was on my school's team my freshman year."

"Hm, alright, well you seem to know what you're doing out there. What positions did you play?" he said, playing with his aged goatee.

"Mostly setting, but our server got injured a couple of months in, so they had me do it for a few weeks. My old coach said I wasn't too bad."

"Nice, nice. We're having tryouts next Friday, and I think you'd make a great addition to the team."

I walked out of the gym with some resemblance of pride. When I was on my team back home, I was sure that I wasn't great. The sport wasn't my focus, I really only picked it up because I was in need of another de-stressor. Strange how when I needed one now, it was there.

I could live through every period that dragged like a fishing line in mud, but lunchtime was a whole other situation. It would be embarrassing to sit somewhere that wasn't with Lyall's friends, not when there was a spotlight on him and me. Even if I were confident enough to sit alone it would be no use. Every single table had bodies stationed. There were empty seats, yeah, but I had made rules. I wasn't going to attempt at friends, I had to be alone. Since that couldn't be the case, I took up talking to the librarian. I asked if I were to be allowed in during the lunch period. "I won't eat or even talk in here, I just need a space to be alone," I told her that first day, "It would be as if I wasn't in here at all." She let me.

It was when I had taken up a spot nearest to the back of the large library that I'd seen I wasn't the only person escaping the pressures of society. James Conwell, the original 'first friend,' had his own section carved out. He peered at me from over his book. I could have sworn he looked confused before hiding completely behind it.