I Failed Didn't I?

I wish I wasn't here ~18~

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Gabby's pov: "yes?" I ask her with a smile that smile soon faded

That moment I wish didn't happen. I wish I wasn't there. What if I could have done something to stop it. But it's to late,

I look at my mom in her hospital bed. It gives me déjà vu just looking at her. It reminds me of looking down at my grandmother. She promised... mom promised that she wouldn't do it ever again. I should have seen it coming...
She's was one of the first people to betray me. Her own kid. She told me she wouldn't do drug's again. Over and over and I still believed her. Even after her friend died because of it she still did it. Even after it almost killing me she did it again and again. Why did I forgive her. FUCK, I SAVED HER LIFE AND THIS IS HOW SHE REPAYS ME. Only if brother knew, he has no idea what she was like before. As a kid she made me feel immensely dreadful about about my body and about how I looked. She manipulated me over and over.

No one could have saved you.... Mom

Time skip~

3rd pov: Gabby told kealey and Emily to pick up eun from school. She didn't what eun to see her like this. When gabby got home she was bombarded with hugs and Felix's brownies.
Gabby knew they we're trying to help but it just made her feel worse. She was still processing everything. She didn't want to even believe that her mom was gone. She didn't even want to think about how she died. It made her want to crumple up. It made her want to be like a homeless dog in the middle of the highway waiting to die but at the same time made her feel like she wanted to beat someone to death. No one knew what she went through. None of the parents that she ever had really made her feel loved and when they did she found out that it was all fake. Gabby wants to forgive them but she just can't bring herself to. All the times that she did forgive they got worse. That's how she learned that if you give someone another chance your just giving them another bullet in a gun.

Time skip~

Gabby's pov: I slowly tip toe out of bed I grab a jacket and put on shoes. I take my purse and put pepper spray and a taser in it.

I get out of my car. I walk toward the dock and sit down on it. I just look into the moon and then up at the sky. "Mom," my voice cracks
"We made a promise and why did you brake it."
The back of my throat burns and my stomach turns. "Mom why didn't you just get rid of me when you could," "dad didn't want anything to do with me, you were broke, dad was a fucking asshole." "That's why I changed my last name, I didn't want someone who never even cared for me's last name." "He didn't deserve to have a new generation of children barring that awful name." "It hurts me knowing all the woman he raped. Including you. I wish I didn't have his blood." "I wish I didn't have his skin color." "I wish I didn't have his hair" "I wish I didn't have a monsters blood."

"I. Don't. Want. To. Be. on. This. Planet. Anymore."

AN: 586 words