𝑴𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉 [english]

14.

“She loves monarch butterflies. They are beautiful. But that beauty hurts me too much. They remind me that I will never see her again. Butterflies are fragile, and so is she". Matthew pronounced almost in a whisper. He was expressionless.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" asked his coworker, the girl who was supposed to tattoo Sofia.

Matthew chuckled at the question. He couldn't help but remember how he had insisted to Sofia not to get a tattoo.

"Yeah. I'm sure". He answered.

The girl sighed and smiled slightly. They weren't really close friends, but they did talk a lot, which is why she knew about Sofia's story. That led Matthew to ask her to get a new drawing on his skin, alluding to Sofia.

"You did most of your tattoos, and you're so much better than me." the girl laughed. "Why are you asking me to do this for you?"

It's a good question, Matthew thought, and smiled formulating his answer.

“First of all, you know that this affects me quite a bit. I don't feel focused enough to do it... Besides, who better than you to do it? You sent her with me... I have all my best experiences and memories on my skin, and Sofia is undoubtedly part of that. I want to have her always with me".

🦋

"Hey, you're back! I just found a movie on TV. It's just getting started. It looks interesting" Sofía received him in her room with white walls and furniture, with a clean smell that was sometimes excessive. She was with her typical excitement and joy. It seemed that everything was fine.

"These days I've been here annoying all the time..." Matthew began to say and Sofía laughed. "Today I went out because I had to do something, something very important".

At that comment, Sofia turned her attention to him, completely forgetting about the movie.

Matthew stared at her for a few seconds with a slight smile.

"So? Tell me!" she asked expectantly.

He simply extended his arm in response. She looked at him for a moment, then returned her gaze to Matthew's face with a shrug.

“There's a huge plastic wrap around my wrist" He told her between laughs. Sofia sometimes could be so distracted, and Matthew loved that.

Sofia got a little annoyed and rolled her eyes at the hint about how absent-minded she could be. She took the boy's arm roughly and studied him again, this time in detail. The plastic on is right wrist covered a monarch butterfly tattoo.

Sofia was speechless. After a few moments, she reacted with a slight smile drawing on her face, accompanied by a few tears that escaped from her already tired eyes, due to so much happiness and love that had suddenly shaken her soul.

She threw herself into hugging Matthew so tightly… She was so grateful to have him. She loved him so, so much. She released him for a moment to look into his eyes, those eyes the same color as her, those hazel eyes that sometimes seemed to have slight hints of green, that she loved so much to see.

She gave him a big smile that Matthew of course reciprocated.

"Matthew, Matthew..." she whispered, hugging him again. Her tears kept falling.

"What's happening?" he asked, caressing the girl's back with one hand, while wiping away his own tears with the other. He didn't like to cry when he was with Sofía, even if it was from happiness, and even though he told her that she shouldn't keep anything to herself, he felt that he must show he was being strong so she will feel encouraged.

Sofia kept clinging to him. Her crying released everything she was feeling in those moments. Love, happiness, gratitude... But above all, an immense peace that, despite the fact that it was filling her body almost completely, didn't prevent a slight hint of fear from also being present in her.

"Sofia?" Matthew asked again, since he had not received an answer before.

Sofia inhaled deeply. She closed her eyes for a few moments and breathed in Matthew's scent. She pulled back once more to watch him. She reviewed every feature of his face. She caressed his cheek as she felt that small hint of fear disappear.

He looked at her so calmly... She looked prettier than ever. That worried him, and at the same time, he was relaxed. He had to restrain himself from bursting into tears.

Sofía, still immersed in great serenity, and reached for Matthew's hand. She looked at the tattoo again. She returned her gaze to his eyes. "I will always be with you… Thank you for being with me" and left a kiss on his cheek.

Her smile didn't fade from her face, and she shook her head slightly at the sensation she had just felt: a few butterflies fluttering in her stomach due to the contact she had with the person with whom she would have wanted to live a love story in other circumstances. And even though that obviously couldn't be, she didn't feel sadness, and instead focused on enjoying the boy's company.

She had one last thought about that relationship that could have been. Though somehow, she had a love story. She had the love of a friend, something she had never felt. She had someone to take care of her, someone to accompany her. She had someone to love.

On the other hand, Matthew had not stopped crying. He knew what was coming, and he wasn't ready.

🦋

Matthew liked many things about Sofía. But above all, that joy she always transmitted. She had a hard story behind her, and even though sometimes the negative feelings were present, she made them disappear to stay happy.

And with that joy that characterized her, and feeling great peace and happiness, Matthew watched her leave.

After that long hug that they shared, Sofia laid back on her bed. And so she spent her last moments in peace, having the company of Matthew.

At first they had been silent. Many times they had been like this, but this time was very different. Matthew didn't know what to say, but he was sure he didn't want to say goodbye. Sofía, for her part, didn't know what to say either, but she was sure that she wanted to give Matthew a few words, the last ones.

"A thousand times I said that thinking that I'm a monarch has helped me. Finding that was something very important in my life. Finding you was very important too. You really are a gift..." A slight smile accompanied by a tear appeared on Matthew's face when he heard the allusion to his name. "Many times thinking that I was going to be alone at this time scared me. But since you found out about my situation, I always knew that you would be with me. Coming out of my chrysalis will be much better thanks to you. Somehow you set me free even before I could get out… I allowed myself to love someone. Now that I'm leaving, I know you'll cry a lot, and even though I don't want you to, I understand that you need to do it. But don't do it for a long time, I wouldn't want you to feel bad for me. I'm going to take the best of this, because I always tried to see the best of each situation. I want you to do the same now. I know this makes you sad, and believe me when I say I wish I could stay, but I can't. I have to go, but I know that I will be fine, and you know that it will be like that... And when my departure makes you feel sad, think of a beautiful monarch spreading its wings to fly high, very high.

After receiving those words, Matthew promised her that he would comply with what she had asked. He held her hand the whole time, even when she was already lifeless. He felt like he didn't have the strength to leave.

She never wanted him to know what ailed her, and Matthew made sure that it stayed that way. He turned a deaf ear to the information that the doctors gave him regarding Sofia's death. He refused to have her cause of death put on the tombstone, which at first looked sad and dull. A common tombstone, which only had the name of the girl. But Matthew fixed that.

At first thought of putting a picture of her, but he didn't. Instead he decided to paint her essence. And from that day on, a monarch butterfly hand-painted by Matthew adorned the place where Sofia's chrysalis was. And he knew she wasn't really there.