Guilt.

School.

Form seems to take hours in a morning despite it being 20 whole minutes. At least in form i sit next to Katrina, Katrina is lovely. She helps me so much.

" Mondays are literally the worst day of the week. " I moan to Kat.

" I know, honestly i fucking hate Mondays! " She giggled.

I let out a small chuckle, so that the teacher would not hear.

" What have we got period one? " Katrina asked me, already dying inside.

I looked at Kat's face while i pulled out my timetable. Same girl. Same. I see that look on your face.. I glanced over my timetable book.

" FUCKING PE?! FIRST PERIOD? " I screamed. I soon realized what i had done..

The teacher stopped talking. Kat was pissing herself laughing. OH FUCK WHAT HAVE I DONE?!

" NICOLE ROBERTS! OUTSIDE NOW. " Ms. Taylor exclaimed, loudly.

Kat was still dying of laughter, tears pricking her eyes of how hard she was chuckling. 

" YOU TOO KATRINA! "

Katrina's face dropped and i think i almost pissed myself. Lilith gave me a look of 'STOP THIS IS TOO FUNNY. '

" MISS I DIDNT EVEN DO ANYTHING?! " Kat remarked.

" DO YOU WANT ISOLATION? " Ms. Taylor offered.

" NOOO! " Kat elongated.

Me and Katrina walked outside the classroom and we burst out laughing. We laughed so loud the teacher from down the hall came out and screamed at us. We both ended up getting after school detentions. 

Fucks sake.

Me, Lilith and Katrina started walking down to PE, exhausted from all the stairs, we finally made it. Me and Kat sat down while Lil got changed. Me and Kat never did PE. After about a minute, our PE teacher glanced at us. 

" Girls why are you not getting changed, AGAIN? "

" Not doing it miss. " Me and Kat responded in sync.

We were getting good at syncing that sentence. I chuckled. Obviously we got sent to a different class. I twinkled my fingers at Lilith and set off. Like usual me and Kat headed for Ms. Smith's Geography. We passed notes until period 2 came around. I had Spanish with Ryuki. I walked in to spanish and then remembered. SHIT Ryu has iso today.

" Yo, whats good Nicole? " Abigail said.

Abigail was just one of the people i knew from near my area. She went here too.

" Yoo! " I hyped up.

I went to sit in my seat, sat down and placed my head on the desk. I fell asleep. I woke to the sound of the bell for break. I went to break and then found my mates. They were all saying something, I couldnt really hear. I was tired. 

10:37 AM, My phone screen read. I had to get to English. I got to English with Lilith and just sat with my head down. I cant even remember why i was upset but the next thing I know is theres tears rolling down my face and my teacher, Mr. Jospeh snaps me back to reality and pulls me outside for the rest of the lesson. He talked to me at the end.

" Why were you crying, Nicole? " He said softly.

Mr. Jospeh truly cared for his students. I loved that about him. He was my favorite teacher.

" I-I dont even know sir. " I said avoiding eye contact. 

The tears started flowing again. 

" shit.. shit.. SHIT! " I mumbled. 

" Its okay Nicole. " He said. 

I just felt so empty it made me so angry and upset. Mr. Jospeh stayed with me until i calmed down. I ended up leaving school and walking home. It wasnt a far walk with a bus. I stayed home, drunk, got high and tried to dissolve my problems.

I blacked out and woke up on the sofa not remembering what happened. 

12:46 AM the clock read.

I slept and decided i wasnt going to school tomorrow. I walked to my bedroom and plopped onto the bed when someone at the door caught my eye. Lilith.

" Hey are you okay? Like really? " She asked coming over and sitting next to me.

" I dont know Lil. I dont know what is wrong with me. " I sighed and tears pricked my eyes.

" Its okay, your safe with me. " She said, for some reason those were the most comforting words ever at that time. I did feel safe with Lilith. We told eachother everything. I love her so much. 

" Hey get some sleep okay? " She said after what seemed like an hour of hugs. Just silent hugs.

" Mkay.. " I said kissing her forehead. 

" Love you sis. " Lilith said.

I paused. 

" Love you too, rat. " I chuckled.

Lilith let out a small giggle that turned into a wheezing cackle. That was the funniest shit ever.

We both went to bed.