enjoy!
I love you, you bloody shank.
They left together again. I mean I get it, Thomas can't go into the maze by himself, he could get lost. Ever since that night in the maze they have been spending most of their time together. Planning, talking, laughing and doing god knows what together. I wanted to know and be part of it, I wanted to be the one who Thomas spend all his wakening hours with, who I laughed with and talked to. I knew I shouldn't be jealous, I knew Thomas and Minho were just close friends, I KNEW Thomas and I were just friends. That Thomas would never think of me like that. I knew I shouldn't feel this way, it was wrong to think like this, I had never felt like this before about any of the other boys. Besides I liked Minho, he was a good shank and he was like my brother.
I watched them go and also went to leave, when I was about to walk out I heard them talking. "Just meet me in the woods in half an hour, alright?" "Yeah, sure, I'll be there." I frowned, why would Minho want to see Thomas in the woods? What were they going to do out there in a pretty abandoned place? My heart is racing and I can't help to think of all the things they could be doing. I ignore it, I can't think like this! It's not good, it's not normal.
When later on the day, the keepers, Thomas and I were standing in the grand hall and they showed me what they got from the griever, Gally tried to get Thomas punished once again. Gally and Thomas got along like gasoline and fire, Gally was a sucker for rules, he practically saw them as law. I couldn't deny that Thomas had broken the rules, but my heart wouldn't let me punish him too harshly. I looked at Thomas and made a decision. So I said: "you're right, Thomas broke the rules. One night in the pit without food." "Oh come on Newt. One night in the pit, do you really think that will stop him from going into the maze?" "No. And we can't have non-runners going into the maze whenever they feel like it. So let's make this official. Starting from tomorrow, you are a runner." I answered Gally's protests. There was a silence and then Gally stalked away angrily. Thomas kept looking at me and then thanked me. I made the mistake of looking into his eyes and then down his body, I couldn't speak so I turned around slowly.
I went back to working until the girl woke up and decided to hide out in the lookout tree, where she starts throwing things from. When Thomas and Minho finally come here, I say: "I don't think she likes us very much." Then Thomas calls out to her and she stops, he slowly climbs up to where she is. I almost get overwhelmed with jealousy, but I manage to reign it in. when after a while we still hadn't heard anything, Gally asked what was going on up there. Thomas answered that they just needed a little more time. I sigh and go and check up on Alby.
When barely half an hour later Minho, Thomas and the girl, who apparently was called Teresa, came to me with something. It looked like some kind of pen, but with a needle. They tell me they think it might save Alby. I examine it and say: "we don't even know what this stuff is. We don't know who send it or why it came up here with you. I mean, for all we know it could kill him." "He's already dying. Look at him. How could this possibly make it any worse? Come on, it's worth a try." Thomas tried to reason with me. I looked at my best friend and said: "alright. Do it." And I give him the potion.
Thomas hurries to Alby to give it to him. He looks towards us and is about to give it when Alby looks at him and grabs his shirt. "You shouldn't be here! You shouldn't be here!" Alby starts screaming. We all hurry to go and help Thomas. When I try to get to Thomas' other side I accidently grab his hips and touch his ass. I tell Alby to calm down, but he won't listen nor is he letting go of Thomas. Which annoys me greatly. Thomas screams to give him the serine, when we finally get Alby to let go of him, Teresa gives Alby the serine. Thank god, Alby calms down immediately. With a trembling voice I order that there should be someone with Alby at all times. Seconds later Gally comes inside and takes Thomas to the pit, where he has to spend the night.
The next morning when I am just about to leave to go and check up on Alby, Thomas calls out for me to wait for him. He runs up to me and says: "hey newt, what are you doing?" "I'm going to go and check up on Alby, why?" I answer. He looks around nervously and even though no one is around he softly says: "I need to talk to you. Privately. Walk with me?" He asks. I nod and follow him into the woods. We walk in silence until we reach the wall. I ask him what he wanted to talk about. He looks at me nervously and says: "alright, euhm, I don't really know how to ask this without offending you or maybe I am over analyzing the situation, but yeah." He looks at the ground awkwardly, sighs and then throws his hands up and asks: "why did you touch my butt yesterday?" my eyes widen and my mouth drops open.
I stare at him without realizing it, thousands of thoughts run through my head. Does he know? How could he, I hadn't told anyone. Except for Alby, but Alby couldn't nor would he ever tell anyone. He knew how to keep a secret. Was I that obvious? Did everyone know? Oh god, everyone knew. They would never look at me the same way. What if they decided they didn't want me here anymore, because they think it's disgusting. Which it is, but I didn't want to die yet. I could change. Oh men, I would rather die than face the others. I wouldn't be able to stand the looks of disgust they would give me. "Newt? Newt! Hey are you in there? What's going on?" I heard Thomas say.
I blinked and looked at him and asked the first thing that came into my mind. "How did you find out? Was I really that obvious about it?" tears start to well up in my eyes, I turn away from a confused Thomas to wipe away the tears so he couldn't see them. "Hey Newt? What are you talking about? Find what out?" Thomas asked me. I look at him confused. "You really don't know? Oh bloody hell, in that case never mind. Forget what I said. It doesn't matter." "But it kind of does. It seems like it made you really upset. Come on, Newt, please talk to me. You can tell me, I swear I will never tell anyone." Thomas pleaded me. "No, Tommy, I can't tell you. Especially not you! You are the one person I can NOT tell. There's too much at stake. I wish I could tell you, Tommy, I really do, but I just can't. It would change the way you look at me forever. And I can't have that, Tommy." I replied with tears of frustration in my eyes. I angrily wipe them away and start walking to the homestead.
Thomas keeps pressuring me about it. After a minute or so of him nagging me about it, I stop walking and turn towards him. Angrily I say: "I can't tell you alright Thomas, I can't. Bloody hell." "Please, Newt, please." He softly begs me, with those big, brown puppy eyes. I can't take it anymore. I throw my hands up and say: "I love you, you bloody shank! There, there you have it. My big secret. I am in love with you Tommy. And I can't keep denying my feelings anymore. I am so so tired of hiding it. Pretending I don't get annoyed by the fact that you spend all your time with Minho. Because I do, I get so jealous of him. And I know I shouldn't. And I am also so tired of pretending not to love you. I love you. I love you, Thomas, from now till forever. And I hope you won't hate me for this, because I can't stand the thought of you hating me." I look at him. "please say something. Anything."
He looks at me shocked then blinks a few times. He looks me straight in the eyes and says: "I love you too, Newt." Then pushes me against the tree and kisses me. It's even better then I imagined it would be.
the end.
a/n: please like/comment/add.
