Saddle up

Chapter Thirty-Eight : Peace

It's hard to explain, really. Everything felt like a dream, but not the kind where you wake up suddenly and everything is fine again. No, this felt... real. Like I was in a place that wasn't exactly life, but wasn't death either.

At first, I didn't know where I was. Everything was a blur—soft light, a sense of stillness, and a quiet that wrapped around me like a blanket. But then, there she was.

A girl. She was standing in front of me, smiling like she already knew me. Her eyes were warm, kind, and there was something about her presence that made me feel calm, because I knew exactly who she was.

"Hi," she said, her voice gentle, like the kind of voice you'd hear when someone tells you everything's going to be okay. "I'm so glad to meet you, Jessica."

I blinked, trying to focus. My heart still felt heavy, the memory of how I had ended up here... gone. Strangled. Dead. The words didn't even make sense in my head, not with her standing in front of me. But I wasn't scared. She didn't seem scary.

"You... you're Kelsey?" I stammered.

She nodded, the softest smile on her face. "I'm so happy Brant found you. He's been through so much, but I can see he's happy again. You make him happy."

I swallowed, my throat dry. Brant. My boyfriend. Her ex-fiancé—The man I loved. I couldn't believe what she was saying—how could she be happy about us? Happy that he had moved on?

Kelsey's smile didn't fade. It only grew. "I'm at peace, Jessica. I've been at peace for a while now. And I'm happy where I am." She paused, her expression softening. "I wanted you to know... please tell him that. Tell him I'm happy and I'm okay."

Tears welled in my eyes. I wanted to ask her so many things, but my throat felt tight, constricting as if I couldn't speak. The whole world felt far away, like I was being pulled between two places, two realities.

"Was it you?" I found myself asking, almost in a whisper. "The signs... through Izzy? Was it you who sent them?

Kelsey's eyes softened further, and she gave a small nod. "Yes, Jessica. It was me. I wanted you to know I was still around, that I was watching over him. I needed to make sure he was okay... and that you were too." She placed a hand over her heart for a brief moment, then gently reached forward, placing her hand over my stomach. "You're pregnant," she said softly. "A little girl."

The words hit me like a wave, something both beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. I didn't know what to say, how to feel. I didn't know if I was supposed to feel relieved or... sad for her. Sad for Brant.

She gave me a final look, the kind that holds so many unsaid things. "And now that I see he's happy again, I can finally rest. I know he'll be okay."

"I just wanted you to know. I wish you both the best, Jess. Truly."

And just like that, her form began to fade, slowly dissolving into the soft light. A part of me wanted to call out, to ask more questions, but no words came. The silence swallowed everything, and I couldn't even hold onto the image of her anymore.

And then—nothing. I sat in the darkness for what felt like an eternity, lost in a stillness that seemed to stretch on forever. It was an empty, quiet space, the kind that made time feel irrelevant. But then, slowly, I began to hear something. At first, it was so faint that I thought it was just my mind playing tricks on me, but the sound grew steadily louder, more distinct.

It was a voice.

My mother's voice.

"Jess, sweetheart... can you hear me?" Her words pierced the silence, and I felt a flicker of recognition, a spark of something familiar and warm deep inside me. It was as if the voice was pulling me back, coaxing me out of the darkness.