I FELT ready, ready to end it all. Being with Liam made me feel like I could do it, but standing in the hospital entrance made me rethink it. But I couldn't keep running from it. I had to do this, they'll never know if I don't.
We went to Liam's house after the ocean, we took a shower together and he let me borrow his clothes before driving me to the hospital.
He offered to go in with me but I declined. I needed to do this alone. He said he'd wait in the car for thirty minutes before going, in case I came out. Knowing he was waiting for me gave me some sort of courage to go on. I could've called dad but I didn't.
I walked to the nurse and asked where Parker was. She gave me a room number in the normal ward, after an interrogation of our relationship. At least that meant Parker was out of danger and not dying because of me.
I got to the door, taking laps of breath, in and out. I flopped each time I got close to pushing the door open. The one that seemed to work was a countdown from 5. I pushed the door when I got to 1.
Parker lay on the bed, his head wrapped in a bandage, a drip connected to his hand. The life support machine beeping steadily, signaling he was still alive.
His mother, who turned out to be mine as well, sat by his side, holding his free hand in hers and humming a sweet melody. She still had last night's clothes on, her hair tied in a messy bun and eye bags ruining the beautiful face, I'd never once admired.
I should've let them in sooner, I had a freaking year but like Liam had said in the car 'Better Late Than Never'. I had a chance now. I just hoped I wouldn't ruin it like I always did.
"How are you?" Leah whispered softly, after looking up shortly to know who came in, then resting her eyes back on her son. "Will?" Only then did I realize she was asking me. It was that tone, that caring tone I'd thought was all fake.
"Fine, I guess." I moved to the sofa at her back, taking a seat. I didn't need to ask how she was doing, I could see it already so I asked, "How's Parker?"
"They said he's just sleeping but he's not waking up." I could hear the melancholy in her voice.
I nodded, replying 'Oh' when I remembered she couldn't see me.
What else? What should I say? I was lost of words, an image of Liam sitting in the car, waiting for me flashed my mind and I thought it better to go back with him, it hadn't been up to ten minutes.
I couldn't say it. Sorry, it sounded so funny to me. "I'll get going then." I regretted it after saying it.
"Can't you stay a few more minutes?" She turned to look at me pleadingly. "He'd really love it if you stayed."
I nodded, took out my phone and texted Liam, telling him I was okay and he should go back, his reply was immediate.
'Take care and call me if anything happens.'
I smiled reading the text. I put my phone back in my pocket, and just sat there staring at the mother-son duo.
"I'm sorry Will." I heard Leah say, I didn't see her face but I knew she was being sincere. I wanted to ask what she was apologizing for, when she went on, "I shouldn't have accused you of pushing him intentionally. I just__I don't know." She turned to look at me, "I've been watching him suffer all his life, so__ I don't know." She paused, resting her head on her palm.
"Sorry I'm being dramatic." I wanted to reach out to her and tell her it was okay, but I couldn't. "When we told Parker the truth about his brother, he wanted nothing more than to meet you. He was so happy I couldn't forget how adorable he looked. Even after you beat him up__" She smiled as if recalling the memory, "He said he was happy at least you acknowledged him."
YOU ARE READING
WILL LIAM
Mystery / Thriller"What are you thinking?" "Licking the icing off your face." Two sad boys who share a name, the rooftop, do they share a sexuality too? Two Williams, one gay, one in denial trying to find catharsis in each other.