eric pov:
i woke up to the sound of my alarm going off
" I wanna roll with him, a hard pair we will be, a little gamblin' is fun when you're with me"
" man i need to tell kyle how i feel somehow" i told my self still lying in bed still
i thoguth of a good plan ill write him a letter and tell him though that letter and then he will fall head over heals for me. he is a stupid jew anyways.
i walked to my desk and started writing
" dear kyle your ginger hair reminds me of Scott Tenorman pubes i glued on to my face but that dose not matter. i dont care if your jewish or a mexican that jump over walls or ever a white person that likes to do furrys and call little girls kittens on dicored. i just want you kyle. yes only you kyle. you make my heart flutter everytime i see you i hope you say yes if i ask you out."
- Eric Theodore Cartman
P.S your the bottom in this relationship.
"that will work" i told my self
i put the letter in my backpack i walked to the bus stop i was so sweaty and nervous that he might reject me. i started getting closer to the bus stop and i saw kenny, stan and kyle. my kyle he is one of a kind no one can relpace him. i started to stare
" stop staring fat ass" kyle said with a frown on his face
"SHUT UP YOU STUDIP JEW" i screamed and walked and stoid next to stan
oh he was on a grumpy mood today this letter will chear him up .
we walked on the bus and i made sure to sit across from him. he crossed his arms and looked out the window. damn he was so cute. that things i would do for him. ill take a bullet even get hit by a train for him my love for his is loyal as possible.
we got to school and i walked up to kyle
" hey kyle, are you busy " i said
" what do you want fat ass im not in the mood today" kyle said
" i just wanted to give you this letter" i told him with a blush
and i ran to the bathroom because even his face makes me want to nut.
"why dose kyle have to be so fine" i yelled when i was done with my business in the bathroom
" what the heck was that "
oh no. it's butters. i tried to grab toilet paper to clean my mess but there was only one square of toliet paper
"fuck you" i said
"hey cartman is that you" butters said
" hey butters can you get me toliet paper " i asked him
" um... the school thought it would be better to move to plastic and use that insted of useing paper" butters said
" FUCK how the hell am i souppoed to clean cum with plastic " i said
" um.. i dont know" butter said and started walking away.
i took off my sweater and cleanned the mess with it. i through it away after
" damn you butters. damn this school. damn that was a good sweater" i said
and i walked out with my chucky n cheese shirt it was a tight shirt and it was small it looked like a crop top
" well i guy this is a start to my fag life" i said.
and a kindergartner saw me
" are you a girl " he asked
" what no im a fag" i said
" whats a fag " he said
" someone that like the same gender or both or whatever" i said
" am i a fag " he asked
" do you like men" i said
" dose my uncle that likes to touch me count " he said
" do you like it" i asked him
" well yes i do i enjoy it to much sometimes and so dose he but white stuff comes out of him and puts it on my face" he said
"than your a fag" i said
" YAY IM A FAG"he screamed in the hallways
look at me helping little kids fine themselfs and the the bell ringed it was the end of the school day.
" that was fast " i told myself
"ERIC " kyle said standing next to kenny, timmy , and stan
oh no im feeling scared. so i ran out and ran to my house to my room and hid under my covers. and then i heard my mom.
"Eric your friends are here" mom said
" mom im changing dont let them in" i said
" oh ok they will wait for you in the living room then "mom said
" what. no mom make them leave" i said
" eric there going up" mom said
" eric we know your in there let us in " kyle said
and they opened the door
" ERIC WE NEED TO TALK" kyle said
i saw stan close the door. omg was i going to get killed
" eric..." kyle said
" dont kill me " i said
" kill you. what?. no i came to talk to you about the letter. i.. just .. i just don't have words. i've also been confued myself i dont know if i like you or i dont know what i want " kyle said looking down nervous.
" i know what you want kyle " i said looking into his eyes and lips
" cart-" kyle said and i kissed him
" shhh baby boy. tell me with your tongue " i said
and we made out but then i push him on the bed
" wait eric aren't we moving to fast" kyle said
" don't you like going fast " i said
and we took off our clothes and then like promised i was the top and he was the bottom.
" we should cosplay as if we where in ww2. i can be hitler " i said
he pushed me off
" really eric, back to your racist joke's where not doing this today " he said and changed and opened the door.
" stan lets go " kyle said
" what did you do. kyle really likes you" stan said and followed kyle
" i didnt mean to " i said
i cried all night
