January 20th, 2011

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January 20th, 2011

Dear Diary,

            The funeral is tomorrow.  I miss Grannie so much.  How on earth am I going to be able to sit through the service full of sniffling people and keep from sniffling myself?  As Grannie’s family, everyone will be watching us: Dad, Mom, Jace, and I.  Mom didn’t particularly enjoy Grannie’s company; I suppose it’s an in-law thing.  That probably means she won’t have the hardest time keeping her composure.  Jace never really was close to Grannie.  He didn’t have the chance to be.  I mean, he was born twelve years after me and by the time he was old enough to develop relationships, we moved.  Gosh, I miss Seattle.  I wonder how things would be different if we had stayed.

            But, right now I’m on the plane flying back to Seattle for the first time in a long time.  When I was growing up, apparently Seattle is too far apart from Florida to visit annually.  I got to go back and see Grannie just before I left for college six years ago.  Now that I think about it, I really should have made more of an effort to call her regularly.  Why didn’t I realize until now just how disconnected we were?  What was my last conversation with her about?  I can’t even remember now.

            I’m worried about Dad, though.  He and Grannie got along really well.  She used to tell us the funniest stories about him growing up.  What is it like to live on a planet knowing that you mother is not on that same planet, too?  I mean lots of people have to go through that, but seeing my dad?  That’s just…depressing.

            And I can’t even really bring myself to think about Grandpa.  He loved her so much.  What if I were to lose Brandan?  He is my heart.  We’ve known each other for three years as of last Tuesday.  Our engagement has only lasted four months.  How would I survive knowing that he wasn’t there for me anymore?

            Now I’m getting emotional.  I can’t get emotional before I even get to the funeral or else I don’t have a chance at getting through the service.

            Well, the plane is landing.  I suppose I’ll have to stop my rant for now.  I’ll write again after the funeral if I can.

Sincerely,

                   Willow

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Sorry it's a little boring, guys, but I had to introduce her and get you a little used to her.  I mean, it's a diary of her everyday life sooooooo not always uber interesting.  Like if I kept a diary (which I used to and kind of failed at... O_o) it would be reallllllyyyy boring.  :P

Thanks for reading!  Don't forget that votes and comments make my day!  ;D

-<3-  Suzanne

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