My Sweet Annie

45

Ana opened the back door to let Porkie out, and I poured each of us a mug of wine and went out to stand next to her, watching the dog mill around the yard. Eventually, we sat down on the top step of the back porch and just listened to the crickets singing. We stayed there even after Porkie had come back to join us, drinking our wine and sitting in silence.

"Do you think it's charged enough?" Ana asked when our mugs were both empty.

"I'll check." I got to my feet. She followed me into the house, Porkie on her heels, and took my mug from me to pour us both some more wine. As she did, I picked up Gran's phone, took a breath, and pressed the power button. The screen flashed to life, moving through the startup animations. Ana joined me, her chin coming to rest on my shoulder.

Despite everything, her nearness made my heart stutter.

"I'm going to make this weird," I said softly.

"Weirder than it already is?"

"Not this." I lifted Gran's phone. "This." I reached back with my left hand, fingers spread, and she slipped her hand into mine.

"Oh. ...Should I be nervous?"

"No, I just...I really like you, Anabel."

I could feel the subtle shift in her expression, the twitch of the muscles under her jaw as she smiled. "I like you too."

"But I'm a little bit of a mess right now. With Gran, and with everything we're finding out, obviously—and Colson..."

"I know. It's way too soon. You were with him for five years."

"How'd you know that?"

"You mentioned it the day he called. I made a mental note."

I could hear the smile in her voice, and I didn't know what to make of it. Maybe I had expected her to be hurt by my caution, but something I had learned about Anabel was that she was...what was the word for it?

Steady, maybe. Calm. She was a sensitive woman who felt things deeply, but she just felt them. She didn't necessarily react to them, not in the way that I might. Had our roles been reversed—had Ana tried to gently tell me she wasn't quite ready for something serious—there was no way I wouldn't have been hurt by what I would perceive as rejection.

"I don't want to..." I tried to find words for what I was feeling. "...I don't want to make you a part of my mess."

"I'm a part of it anyway. I loved Ruth, too, Tabitha. I want to find out what happened to her—and what happened to that girl a long time ago. And as for..." She squeezed my hand. "...I think we both know there's not much of a chance for anything serious between us. Right?"

"Right."

"You live halfway across the country from here. You're only in town for a few weeks at best."

"Yeah."

"Yeah. So...Trust me, I've thought about it. I'm not getting my hopes up."

"Okay."

"If I'm making you uncomfortable, I can—"

"No." I turned, releasing her hand, so that I could face her, my back against the counter. We were close, and the last thing I wanted was for her to give me space. I put my free arm around her, not quite holding her, but framing her in an embrace she didn't shake off. I had almost forgotten Gran's phone, still clasped in my right hand. "You're pretty much the only thing keeping me steady right now. Which, now that I say it, is a shitty and manipulative thing to—"

Ana leaned in, rising up on her toes to press a soft kiss to my lips. My mind went blank, my eyes dropped closed, and my arms tightened around her, drawing her closer. She draped her arm around my shoulders, and the kiss lingered for a moment, sweet and gentle, before she broke away.