S.S Those who were left behind.

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Hikigaya Komachi POV

It's been about six months since my brother died.

I honestly don't know what to do.

At first I thought it was a bad joke from him when my mom called me.

I thought that when I got to the hospital I would find him with his irritating smile, only to have her say "haaaaaaaaaa, look how she loves his brother, she ran out to see him, relax sis, this will score you a lot of points".

I would give anything for that to have happened.

When I arrived my dad had a very serious face but I could see him, he was on the verge of crying, my mom was sitting on a chair sobbing with her hands covering her face.

My dad upon seeing me arrive spoke to me about what he thought was a surreal situation.

Dad: Komachi, I want you to take what I'm about to tell you calmly.

I was saying that, but it was impossible for me to be calm.

Dad: Hachi........ Hachiman..... He..... is dead.

I can see the pain it causes him to utter those words, but it was necessary for me to know.

At that moment I lost all light, I can't remember anything else, I don't remember if I cried or screamed.

Time began to pass very slowly.

When the funeral was done I only vaguely remember some things.

Like the irresponsible owner of the dog who let him loose, I think her name was Yuigahama or something like that.

A girl and a lady kept apologizing, there was also the owner of the car that ran over him.

I hated them, I hated them with all my being.

I know it's not fair that I hated them, but it's the only thing I can hold on to in those moments.

In the end Dad dealt with them, because Mom and I were not in optimal condition.

There is something that also causes me extreme resentment, is that at the funeral I could only see family members and some teachers from Onii-chan's high school. No classmates from her school.

There was only one girl who was a classmate of his.

I couldn't remember her name.

?: So Hikigaya died.

Cold words but I could feel sadness in them, but he didn't pay much attention to it. He just paid his respects and left.

After that the memories become more disorganized.

My parents try to keep a strong front in front of me, but when they don't have to work and are home, they think I'm asleep.

There I see mom crying quietly with dad who now that I see him, there are several gray hairs in his hair, is comforting him.

As for me, I moved away from all my classmates and friends, I don't have the energy to pretend to be well.

Every morning I find it harder to get up, I don't talk to anyone and no one talks to me.

I ask myself, is this the loneliness he endured?

It saddens me that the only way I managed to understand him is when he's gone.

My careless words may have forced him to think it wasn't enough.

He may have even resented me for the way our parents spoiled me.

Just imagining Onii-chan's hateful face makes my heart ache.

I am absolutely lost.

Onii-chan was the closest person to me, of course I love my parents, but since they stayed away for work matters, Onii-chan always took care of me.

I guess for him, it was big brother's duty to protect me.

But I could never thank him for everything he did for me.

I miss when he read me stories.

I miss when he protected me from the dogs that scared me.

I miss when he only made scrambled eggs because he didn't know how to cook anymore.

I miss when he would look for dangerous objects so I wouldn't run into them.

I miss his incessant chatter about his school life.

I miss too many things.

But most of all I miss my Onii-chan.

I'm just sure this is the beginning of Hikigaya Komachi's lonely days.

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