It's past midnight when Jun decided to sneak out from his dark, yet warm room, keeping his actions unaudible for the world, and jumped on the cement-road.
As soon as he found himself stable on place, a cold breeze brushed his entire body, sending shivers of first week of December. A faint smell of roses in air, and the very lavender perfume Jun found familiar, but it was too cold to take a deep breathe and recall all the past memories.
He rubbed his hands together and tried to warm himself up in the cold night, as started to walk on dark road which maybe could help him to find his fifteen year old self.
Happiness was never been in good terms with him, he knew.
He still felt the urge to sneak out from his cold apartment even being returning here after more than just few years.
He still feels the urge to roam down on the korean lonely streets where he used to find a certain someone with their someone.
He doesn't know if today, after so many years of returning back from China, he will still be able to find his friend down on this street with his girlfriend.
The street light flicks for a moment before going back to black again. Things doesn't change here, Jun is gald to see.
The street are oddly familiar like back of his hand. They are clean and safe in dark. A blue place for Jun to sneak out and stay until morning comes. Nobody waits at his cold apartment for him to come back. There's nobody who will ask him what take him so long, not even his only Chinese friend who never noticed his existence.
Jun wonders if Minghao tried to reach him after he left. If Minghao sent letters to his hometown in China or even tried to call him.
The lavender-perfume boy was-is his favorite among all the Chinese-transfered students. He still remembers bumping into him and next day a small 'hello,' and another day a 'friendly hangout,' and another day talking and laughing like childhood friends.
Those moments are so precious to him like the last bite of cake for every kid on birthdays. He doesn't want anyone else to steal it from him.
Though things takes turn. And when Moon Junhui thought they both have mutual feelings for each other, Xu Minghao introduced his girlfriend to him.
How much good Jun could act that day, he acted and showed how happy he was, but acting never can compare to the real emotions he let out inside those four walls of his cold apartment. He never knew heart break feels so damn painfull until that day and days after that day.
He slowly saw his friend drifting apart from him day by day even after sitting side by side in classes. Those talking and laughing just became some beautiful memories for hin to cherish.
When they stopped eating together? When they stopped hanging out together? When they stopped talking? When they became strangers from bestfriend?
It all happened the day when Minghao introduced his girlfriend.
That was also the time when Jun found his blue time of the day. That was the first time he sneaked out in midnight and explored these lonely streets. The time when he finally tried to move on.
But nothing goes according to him.
That midnight he found the very boy hanging out with his girlfriend on the corner of these streets, smiling and laughing echoing in distance.
Despite the fact that he wanted to be with him, he turned his heels in an alley and heard his melodious honey voice until they were gone.
And this turned his routine of every midnight just to find a little stolen warmth of someone else.
There was a time when he didn't want to continue these things and moved to China back in high school, but after years of trying he again found himself on the very streets of Korea.
He knows the boy he fell in love with doesn't come here anymore, but still trying to hug thr familiarity of surrounding he goes to these streets.
They never mean to be together, he knows.
The lonely night can be this warm, Jun really wants nobody else find out. Atleast he wants his blue place to be his forever.
These nights are so lost and lovely like fantasy that Jun wants the time to stop and never start again.
He wants to be like tusi forever, alone in these streets waiting for certain someone to come back to him.
He closes his eyes to feel the surroundings when an unnatural sound of footsteps slowly comes closer to him. He sighs. He doesn't know this area is still under control of police.
"Jun hyung?" A small, very small faint honey voice filled Jun's ears. Familiar Chinese accent dripping down in every word the person behind him spoke. The same lavender perfume fills his surroundings.
"Jun hyung?" Hearing the worss again, Jun debates if he should turn around and see it it's really the very person he wants to see.
He slowly, hesitantly and curiously turned around.
Years which felt like decades a fee moment ago are feeling like seconds now. Like just yesterday he met this boy in school corridor and now meeting again to say 'hi.'
Minghao changed a lot in these years. He grew up, but still smaller, than him. His black bangs rests flawlessly on his forehead. A long coat hang in his shoulders to protect him from cold.
Even in dark, Jun can see the shining crystal in the latter's eyes telling thousands of stories of past years.
"Ming -" Before he can even calm out his name, the latter threw his body in Jun, wrapping his hands around his neck and hugging so tightly like hr will disappear from his sight.
"Where the fuck you were all these years?! Who the hell do you think you are?! Why did you change your number?! You didn't even tell me! You were not even in your hometown!" Rhe yells echoes around the streets with Minghao's load sobs, which doesn't help but makes Jun wrap his arms around Minghao's waist to stop him from yelling.
He is afraid if Minghao's voice will wake up the neighbors at a distance, but a little more he's afraid if thr feelings he has will be obvious for Minghao.
He afraid of Minghao will drift apart again.
He is afraid if Minghao's this concern will turn out to be friendly.
He is afraid of Minghao's warmth will last forever or not.
But thr heat they feel in each other is telling a story they both are waiting to hear.
"Why did you leave m-me hyung?" Minghao's voice turns out to be small. He doesn't break the hug to look at Jun, but continued,"I'm sorry, h-hyung, but I.. I love you, please d-don't leave me again. I don't feel same with others like I feel with you.."
Jun is blank on words. He only hears 'I love you,' nothing else. And suddenly the concern he thought is friendly, feels like long-lost lovers.
He suddenly feels like home.
He tights the hug, giving a 'yes' as reply, as tears rolls on his cheeks. How much he missed this day to come, nobody can tall, not even he himself.
Suddenly he feels like happiness is now in good terms with him.
He finally finds his home, not a cold apartment.
○●__________End__________●○
