A reflection

The room ...

Molly gripped the side of the sofa she was sitting on for strength. Sherlock would wake any minute now. And she would loose him forever. What would she say ? How would she explain ?

She studied Sherlock's face for clues as to when he would stir. She noticed that his eyes were moving very rapidly under his eyes either suggesting he was dreaming or that he was in his mind palace , she favoured the latter as she had seen him sleeping and it is not normally as noticeable. It was probably the only way he could make sense of what had happened. What she would give to see what he was seeing. maybe it would help her explain...

No... not that room. Sherlock slammed the door shut and charged down the corridor. He found the next room and sighed. Here he was, " Redbeard ...here boy !" Sherlock knelt down and was knocked over by the dog that bounded up to him. " Good Boy". Sherlock began to find comfort in his beloved dogs long fur and the smell coming from the dogs body reminded him of his mothers cooking at home. His much loved dog began to tug on his coat to play. Sherlock stood and retrieved a ball he always held in his mind palace coat. He flung it down the corridor and waited for redbeard to bring it back. The dog caught it mid flight and sprinted back to sherlock who was begining to feel so carefree again , much like when he was 9 and Mycroft was off boarding at senior school. He began to laugh at the way redbeards tail flopped about when he was running. Throwing the ball one last time Sherlock flopped to the floor , warm with the glow of being reunited with his old friend . Then with a pang he remembered why he was here. John was back. But surely it couldn't be ? But he was , John was there , he was there. There as solid as rock. He even spoke to Sherlock, saying all was ok. But people do not come back from the dead. It was scientifically impossible! But even molly saw him.

Molly.

Why didn't Molly seem too startled, in fact her screaming was rather faked. She was a terrible actor. But if she wasn't terrified , then why was she screaming so much. Why was it that should could run up the stairs and not remained fixed in fear at the door step.

She knew.

She knew John was alive. Which meant she let Sherlock grieve for two years over his dead best friend. Watched as he nearly ended his life multiple times to get to john, she wiped all the tears that fell because John would never again walk through. And she never told him.

How could she , he gave her his first kiss, he allowed himself to fall in love with her. And she knew the whole time, the traitor. " Redbeard , she needs to pay, how could she.. how could she let me cry over something that I didn't need to be crying over. Why would she watched through all the pain I went through , she never even gave a second thought as to why I might need the infomation, I wanted my best friend back!! I wanted John back like I wanted you back redbeard. She toiled with me ... evil..... She needs to explain !!"

Sherlock stood up and began the process of escaping his world when something caught his eye, something that had never been here before. The was a new door , it was so plain that it was easy to miss but he knew for sure that it wasn't there before.

He reached out for the small handle that allowed him to gaze inside the room. He pushed open the door and a wave of emotions hit him. It was a simple room with a single window that looked out upon a beautiful meadow. The room contained a long desk down one side and the other a huge book case with row upon row of books, which upon further inspection were collections of pathology text books, human anatomy, a couple of silly ones about cats, teen fictions with strong female characters, lovey comedy type books, but all books that had been clearly read thousands of times.

On the desk laid a microscope with an array of case notes spread across the top. Cases he and Molly had worked on. And that's when it hit him. This was MOLLYS room. Sherlock had always promised he would delete any irrelevant information so why was all this here, sure he had some sort of feelings for her , but she was not that relevant surely ? . He went to the corner where he found lots of warm blankets molly loved to curl up in, hot chocolate with a mountain of whipped cream and hundreds of marshmallows on , several comedy DVDs of John Bishop and Russell Howard, Harry potter films , several DVD'S all featuring this one actor she was in love with, musical DVDs.

A worn out lab coat was hanging up on the wall beside a small picture. On closer inspection this picture was of Molly and Sherlock hugging and laughing. That is when Sherlock realised. All these things he didn't delete them , because they are important to Molly , and that must mean that Molly was more important to him than he realised. This meant that Molly must feel the same way.

Sherlock sat down and wrapped himself in one of the blankets. However, why would she keep the fact that John was alive from him. Why wouldn't she tell him, why did she let him mourn over a friend he never lost. He scrunched the blankets up beneath him and looked desperately around the walls for more details , there must be a reason. Molly was so weak, it would have taken a very good reason for her to keep a secret like that. Then on the door were all the reasons he needed.

A single lock and key were hooked on the back of the door with a knife attached so that it couldn't be used unless the lock was opened. It didn't take Sherlock long to figure out what the metaphor meant.

Before John " Died" there was a man, a man set on killing Sherlock. Except he knew that Sherlock would have wriggled his way out of anything meaning that he would have not died and carried on living and killing Sherlock would have no effect. So if the Man couldn't kill him , the next best thing was to put him out of action. Which meant, John had to die. The Man knew that Sherlock would go out of his mind with the only person who meant enough to him that would mean Sherlock kept on the straight and narrow. So why not kill him?

Then how did John surv...oh. Mycroft. Mycroft must have heard about the plan and stepped in to help John. The Man only thought that John mattered enough to Sherlock but there was someone else who could step in , that may help more that the landlady or his Lestrade. Molly. They must have hatched the plan there and then. That's why John , Molly and Mycroft were always unavailable at the same time , could be coincidence but the universe is rarely so lazy.

However if Sherlock knew about how John was alive then he would go after him to bring him back to baker street, and if that happened, not only would John have been killed , but Sherlock also.

Molly kept the secret from him to save his life.

Sherlock sat stunned in his mind palace. She did that for him.

He didn't know what to do... no he did. Sherlock stood and exited the room but not before taking the knife and chucking it in a "junk room" to be deleted later. Nothing as vile as a murder weapon should be in Molly's room.

....................................................................................................................................

It had been hours since Sherlock had collapsed on the sofa. Molly was going out of her mind. She knew only the truth would do but would Sherlock listen. She could only hope he would. It seemed silly to say this but she also hoped that he would forgive her and that things wouldn't change. That we would see how much she had wanted to tell him. But to tell him would kill him.

She was about to leave the chair to stretch her legs when she noticed Sherlock stirring.... and slowly ... beginning... to wake ....up