Qurbat, Near You

3- Protective Side Of Adhir

Lol, Adhir means Impatient. Lol, my character means impatient. And I never realized this until now. So, smart of me to name my character as IMPATIENT. 

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Adhir looked guilty. 

His eyes were gazing at the floor, his stance was no longer rigid, but his shoulders were slumped, his fingers were tugging on the rings his fingers were adorned with. Kabir saw something in his eyes that made his heart ache. Helplessness. 

It's the most evil feeling. To feel helpless. When you know you can change things, when you believe that you can be the change but when you fail to be the change, it hurts. It hurts when everything starts ruining in front of yours eyes and all you can do is stand and watch. 

Adhir had witnessed this phase so many times that not being helpless makes him feel reckless. 

"You did it intentionally?" Kabir asked him, and Adhir looked up, scrunching his eyebrows slightly as he shook his head. 

"Intentionally as in, I.... I knew what I was doing, I just.... I just couldn't control it. I am sorry, Kabir. I am so sorry." Adhir said, and Kabir gently held his shoulders, and pulled Adhir towards himself, gently rubbing his back. 

"You didn't hurt me, Adhir. Why are you apologizing to me?" Kabir asked him, and Adhir looked at him, through his wet lashes, and shook his head. 

"Pata nahi. Maybe because Jiju won't feel the anger. I know he would feel nothing seeing his broken phone but I am guilty." Adhir said, and Kabir sighed, kissing his hair, as he shook his head, making him sit on the bed before kneeling down in front of him. 

"Sometimes we are.... not in our senses, Adhir. Main nahi bolrha ki you did the right thing, but I understand, Adhir. And I am sure, Jai, your Jiju would also understand....... at least, he would try to. And as long as you don't cause any intentional harm, with the intention of hurting someone, we can improve things, Adhir. Things take time. Don't be so hard on yourself." Kabir said, ruffling his hair, and Adhir tilted his head slightly. 

"Kitna time aur, Kabir?" Adhir wondered, and Kabir fell silent. He had no answer. 

"I almost overdosed once." Kabir said, and Adhir froze. 

He turned his face slightly, the gentle caress of vulnerability was clear in the oldest Raheja's eyes. Kabir looked exceptionally flawless in that moment. Fragile, vulnerable, unguarded, yet so raw, strong, invincible. 

"We always think, Adhir, life is unfair with us, but in reality, it is not fair with anyone. But it's okay, Adhir, as long as we are swimming, and not drowning, and even if we are drowning, but not giving up, and swimming back to the surface, we'll be fine. Hm? Aur ek baar humesha yaad rakhna, Adhir, if you keep crying about your life, beta, and do nothing about it, that's when life becomes bitter. Life gives you lemon, Adhir, we convert it into a bitter gourd." Kabir said, and Adhir nodded his head. 

"Why did you not give up?" Adhir asked again, when Kabir stood up, ready to pull Adhir up too. The question made Kabir stop in his steps. He turned to look at his newest child and smiled.

"I don't know, Adhir. I just felt that I am not alive for nothing. Remember, stories are written on characters that are not normal, Adhir. And even if they are, their actions are not normal. And I had Manthan with me. The kid relied on me too much, I couldn't break his trust. I didn't had the courage to leave behind the child who refused to eat without me. Main mar jaata, toh Manthan reh nhi paata, Adhir. I knew I had to carve my way out." Kabir said, and Adhir stood up, holding Kabir's wrist.