Lessons

Every step forward (is three more back)

TW: PTSD, implied abuse, bullying, maybe inadequate help,
Please let me know if I missed any

School.

It was a terrible thing.

He hated it.

A lot of kids hate school, but he thinks he out-hates them. It's always the same. He's new, he's beaten up by words or fists, and a few months later, he's gone.

His childhood consisted of new families, new rooms, and new schools. He has had to introduce himself so many times that he's gotten the whole speech down to two words. He's met so many classmates and teachers. He's hated them all, and the whole place should burn.

But when Phil said he was going to school, he simply nodded. He went school shopping with Wilbur and Tommy. He got a backpack, pencils, a few notebooks, and some other things.

He didn't want to go to school. He wanted to stay at home with Phil and Wilbur and Tommy. He didn't want another round of darts and anxiety, not when he's gotten slightly better.

But on the first day of school, he held his breath and walked into the building with Wilbur.

He would be fine.

He would be fine.

He would be fine

Nothing bad would happen.

He instinctively put his head down, following behind Wilbur as they went to the office. He could feel the stares and the questions that no one dared ask. It made his skin crawl, and he wanted to pull down his sleeves further, roll his socks up, cover all the scars, visible and invisible.

He didn't realize they had reached the office until Wilbur stopped, and he almost bumped into them.

"Hey Hannah, this is my brother Techno, and he needs his schedule. Techno this is Ms. Hannah Rose, the frontdesk operator."

"Good morning, Ma'am." He said with a nod.

She waved her hand dismissively, "Just Hannah, or Ms. Hannah, or Ms. Rose."

"Oh- okay."

"Anyway, let's get you your schedule." She said cheerily, typing on the computer. She walked over to the printer in the corner a second later and handed Techno a piece of paper. "You've got the same classes as Wilbur. If you don't like the electives, come see me or Mr. Halo, and we'll get you into a different class."

He nodded, and Wilbur led him off excitedly. "Come on, we can meet some of my friends before morning bell."

The brunette led him to the cafeteria, explaining that this was mostly where they hung out in the mornings. Wilbur introduced him to a few of his friends.

Every minute he stood there was a reminder of how different their lives were to his. How they can talk so easily and how they can express themselves. How emotionally unrestrained they were, and his inability to do that.

Wilbur nudged Techno, "new place gotta start with a cleanse, you know, before you get involved in all the drama."

"Drama?"

"Yeah, all the drama, like fights and true loves, late night parties." He waves his hand around asking Techno to continue the outlandish list.

Wilbur tries really hard, maybe too hard. Techno just keeps failing him, not saying anything. But his brother just smiles and continues talking. Techno isn't accustomed to permanent or to connections or trust.

The bell rang, and Wilbur gestured for Techno to follow. He doesn't grab his hand or make a move to. He just starts walking away.

They walked into the first class, and Techno gathered his confidence to not bolt out. He squashed all his fears into his little box and followed Wilbur.