Drown | Ruby da Cherry

1. Hydraulis of Dion

May 1, 2015

My stomach hurt again. It usually does when I'm anxious or upset, which I've been a lot of these days. The universe hasn't been very kind to me this past year... It feels like I'm a wet towel being wrung out and splattering on the ground. Drops of me fall around, unable to find each other again. I try to vomit but I only dry heave into the sink.

"Mary Ella! Are you even listening to me?" Hannah said over lunch. We were eating in the hospital cafeteria like we do nearly every day. A salad, a sandwich, mandarin orange slices, and apple juice. I ignored the mispronunciation; no matter how often I corrected her, she still insisted she was doing her best.

Hannah played with her honey-blonde hair. She twirled a lock around her finger, the strands getting caught around her pink fingernails. She let the hair go and it fell straight, the piece framing her face. Her full lips wrapped around her straw as she sipped her juice. It's 2015, I thought we were done with single-use plastic.

"Sorry...zoned out," I sheepishly replied. "What were you saying?"

"So, I'm going to pick you up at 9 then we'll go to the club after pregaming."

Ugh, another end-of-semester club night I completely forgot about. Hannah keeps trying to drag me to parties, concerts, and festivals in an effort to get me out of the house just to do something. She had convinced me to request the night off, so if I'm not working, I might as well be doing something, right?

Hannah rattled off the rest of the plans to me as I silently ate my lunch. After ten minutes, our lunch breaks were nearly over. I packed up my things, headed out of the hospital cafeteria, and made my way back to my floor. I loathed eating my lunch alone since I'm not super friendly with anybody in my department so Hannah and I usually coordinate our schedules so we can eat together, even if I wouldn't consider her a good friend.

Hannah and I first met in this cafeteria, almost exactly one year prior. When I moved back home to New Orleans and got a job at the hospital, Hannah and I took our breaks around the same time. We were usually next to each other in the checkout line, so we eventually started eating together.

Just like eating lunch with Hannah was part of my daily routine, getting off late was part of it too. I'm only scheduled until five, but I didn't actually get out to the bus stop until almost six. It's almost an hour drive home, accounting for traffic, only giving me a short time to make dinner and get ready before leaving.

"Maritza," my little brother, Andres, screamed as I walked through the door. Our sister trotted along behind him, looking equally annoyed. "Tell Mercedes that it's my turn to use the laptop. She's had it since we got home."

"Mariela...please tell Andres that I'm using the laptop for schoolwork, not jacking off to porn," Mercedes retorted, carrying my laptop in her arms.

Yeah, welcome home...

"How about this?" I said, grabbing the laptop from Mercedes and closing it. "Nobody gets it if you two can't share. You," I pointed to Andres, "can use your phone to do whatever. And you," I pointed to Mercedes, "can go to the library to finish your homework if this is how you two are going to act."

The teenagers started to protest. Eventually, the two came up with a plan to divide the time equitably between the laptop so nobody needs to stop their schoolwork so the other can watch YouTube and vice versa. They fell right into my trap without ever realizing what I was doing.

By the time they finished arguing and the house was quiet, it was almost 7:30; Hannah would be here any minute and I wasn't even dressed. As I scrambled around my room, digging through my closet just trying to find something decent to wear, Mercedes came in.

"Here," she said handing me a stack of folded-up clothes with tags sticking out the sides. "I didn't get to wear this over the summer; you can wear it to your party tonight."

Even my 15-year-old sister remembered the party when I didn't.

"Don't you want to wear it to prom tonight? It's pretty cute!" I asked, looking at the outfit. It was a floor-length sparkly gown with a corset back. It was flowy, perfect for a warm night. Not perfect for a night out at the club.

"No, nobody would want me there anyway," she said simply.

"That's not true! You have lots of friends there that would love to see you." She didn't respond. "Did something happen today?" She shook her head, but I know the last month of school before summer can be brutal. "How about this? You try to go, just for an hour, and if you don't like it, I'll pick you up right away."

At that, Mercedes perked up and took her clothes back. Well, at least one problem got solved but I'm still back at square one.

Right on time, Angelina, the 20-year-old from across the street who often babysits the younger kids, knocked at the door. I reminded Angelina that everyone needs to complete their homework before going out and that Andres's girlfriend isn't allowed over unsupervised. The older kids may not need her, but I remember being a free babysitter at their age so I try not to put the responsibility on them.

I still wasn't ready by the time Hannah and her friends arrived. Once again, Mercedes came to my rescue. Buried deep in the bowels of my closet was an item of clothing I don't even remember buying; a black satin dress that clung to my curves.

"Do my boobs look weird?" I asked the group. The dress was more revealing than I'm used to, so I couldn't tell if it looked good on me. I tried to do something with my short, black hair but didn't succeed.

"You look hot," Celine encouraged. She helped me put on my shoes before we decided I matched the rest of them.

"Have fun you guys," I told Isabel and Omar, the youngest of the siblings, as I kissed them on their cheeks. "I'll see you in the morning."

As usual, I'm the designated driver. I didn't know any of Hannah's friends except for Celine but even then, I didn't know her that well. She was always friendly to me, though. I was driving with Hannah in the passenger's seat and Celine sandwiched between April and Bronwen. A nearly drunk April kept trying to mess with the radio by crawling over Celine's lap and halfway into the front half of the car. They all started their night by passing around a bottle in the car, despite my protests, on the way. I swear to God I will turn this car around...

"This is it," Hannah said as we cruised past a large house with people spilling out of all entrances. "We're just getting some free drinks and then we're leaving; no more than an hour."

There was no parking on the street in front of the house, so we pulled up a few blocks and walked. Well, I should say that I walked while everyone else kind of staggered along behind me. Hannah wasn't as intoxicated as her friends, tipsy at most since she's the one that drove to my house, but she still swayed back and forth with Bronwen.

We all went our separate ways once we got into the house. Bronwen and Celine sat on the couch with some people they know, April went upstairs, and Hannah went into the kitchen. I found a cozy little spot outside on the patio.