I deleted all my social media.
I blocked everyone's numbers.
Maybe I can get back to how I was before.
Before I met livi.
Before Kayla showed me what it was like to be loved. Or what I thought it was like to be loved.
Before I knew what it would be like to have a family.
Before I knew that a baby wasn't in my future.
Before I gave up so completely.
I start teaching today. My first class is at 11:30. It's ballet 1. The 4 year olds. Maybe by Christmas I can start teaching the higher classes again. Maybe by next spring I I'll be able to earn my spot back in the company. Maybe if I work hard I'll finally get the solo. Maybe I will get into a professional company. Maybe I will get to be the prima.
I guess the bright side right now is that I'm not having to pay for new shoes every week. I've been dancing in these same shoes since February.
I'm pushing everyone away so that I can focus. Focus on getting back to where I was.
