𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬ⁿᵃᵈᵉⁿ

𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐲 "𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝"

nessa is on the zach sang show.

"hello nessa welcome back." zach starts. "thanks for having me." nessa smiles softly. "so today we are gonna be talking about u know just simple things and projects coming up." zach shows. "mhm." nessa nods.

"so some our of team and ur team notified us saying u and jaden were in the hospital for a couple hours if u feel like it u can tell us if u don't its okay?" zach asks.

"so umm i mean i knew this a couple months ago but jaden and i was trying for another kid so like nori has someone she can like play with but it turns out i can't have kids anymore or there is a rare rare change that i can." nessa answers.

"why?" zach asks.

"because like since my ed has gotten worse and its been worse for a couple months since its so bad i like there's a low chance that i can have kids because like eating disorders like anorexia and bulimia may negatively affect your ability to get pregnant and that's why there is a low chance but i can maybe still have kids." nessa explains."i knew this a couple years ago that's why i was so shock thay i got pregnant with nori and i didn't think it could happen because of my eating disorder." nessa adds.

"would u guys ever look to adopt if u can't get pregnant again?" zach also asks.

"yeah jaden and i talked about it but i think we should wait a little longer maybe fron 2 or 3 years from now because we are struggling so bad and we feel bad enough that we can't really take care of nori." nessa says.

"i am so sorry." zach says.

"its okay i mean jaden and i are brokenhearted because of it and it just hurt us so much hearing those but like i knew the consequences of my actions and that's why i keep apologizing and apologizing to jaden because i know its my fault it is and i know that he knows that bree knows that and its just its so overwhelming and i just its so hard to deal with something like that." nessa explains.

"have u always been wanting to be a mother?" dan asks her.

"yes ever since i was a kid i was just i loved taking care of people i took care of my mom, my brother, and my friends and i couldn't wait to have someone of my own i can look out for forever and being mom has changed me alot she makes me so much happier she understands me and it was so like its just an exciting experience." nessa smiles.

"speaking of that..." zach gets cut off.

"were u and jaden ever engaged when u guys started dating in 2021?" dan asks

nessa giggles shyly

"i mean umm y-yeah." nessa finally gets out. "wait actually?" zach asks. "i mean yeah he like he got on one knee and proposed to me a day before my birthday." nessa reveals.

"wait so was that the date of the sticky note in the lie music video?" zach brings up. "yeah." nessa smiles.

"i umm i did keep the ring bc it was given to someone i love and someone i care deeply about but we were just so young and i couldn't even like u know take care of myself he was taking care of me everyday and i didn't want him to do that for the rest of his life because i just felt so helpless back that and because i was getting so bad i broke up with him." nessa explains.

"so like it was real?" dan asks.

"yes." nessa says. "and this kinda funny story but like back in 2021 we took this picture and i was like on his back in our bedroom and i had the ring on and no one knew but when someone commented about it i looked so closely and i see u can see it so i had to like delete the picture photoshop the ring off and repost it." nessa exposes herself.

they all laugh.

"so lie is about jaden?" zach asks trying to understand. "yes it is i wrote it and recorded it when we broke up and when he was in a new relationship and i knew it wasn't fair bc i was with someone and so was he but i just felt like i was still in love with jaden deeply like the man literally proposed to me and i can't ever forget that the first time he did but umm i wrote it for closure and it did not work but i just i wanted him to be happy even if that wasn't with me." nessa explains.

"was it hard when u lost him like when u guys broke up?"

"yes i was i was heartbroken and it just we both were and when we like when we lost cooper it just got alot worse cause like..." nessa tries to find the words.

"u guys shared him." zach finds the words for her.

"yeah." nessa says. "and like it was always the 3 of us everywhere and it was so hard because like." nessa takes a pause.

"cooper will always be my best friend and there's no way i can find someone like him because i can't not in a lifetime its just so he was so special he helped me through everything and it was so, so refreshing to have a real best friend that loved me for me and its just i can never ever ever meet someone like him he got me through so much in the past 2 and half years and he loved me he really did but yeah i can never meet someone like that but now i say my bestfriend is a ghost which is really sad it is but like he's still with me and i can feel it." nessa explains trying not to cry.

"but like he's with me when i truly need him like on stage when i sang die first i knew he was with me but he shows himself less and less everyday but he like appears in my dreams and stuff but he is slowly fading away bc like i feel like he wants me to like i don't know how to say it but he wants to leave so im not like i don't know but he is there when i truly need him." nessa states.

"on tour u wrote 7 songs a day." zach reads. "yeah." nessa nods. "are those the songs for ur ep coming up?" zach asks.

"well i wrote motel whore on tour and that will be on the tracklist." nessa confirms. "whats that about?" zach asks her. "its about being taken advantage of and like desperate love its so dark and it started as a poem but like yeah." nessa giggles awkwardly.

"when will it be coming out?" dan asks. "july 14th." nessa finally confirms. "well can't wait for that." zach adds in.

"so have u wrote any songs for cooper?" dan asks. "yeah i have an unreleased song called club haven that i wrote for him but like im not gonna release the song any time soon bc i feel like it's just a i don't feel comfortable releasing the song." nessa says.

"well i mean its ur choice and whatever ur not comfortable with is okay u don't have to release it we understand." zach tells her.

"well i want to say thank u for being with us again and we really appreciate it." zach smiles.

"yeah my daughter is obsessed with this show and she can't wait for a new video coming out." nessa smiles. "oh really well tell her we said hi." zach says."i will." nessa says.