The Boyz smut collection

Jacob : All that you are

Written by : @/snowflakewhispers on Tumblr.

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You can't remember the last time you felt good about yourself. You shouldn't even be obsessing over your looks, really, and your loved ones would hate to find out you've been feeling like this again, but it's nearly impossible to suppress the obsessive thoughts when society expects everyone to act like an influencer. Right now, you're just feeling even worse about it after making the most ridiculous purchase of your life.

You're in your bedroom holding your new lingerie set at arms length with your face twisted in a sour expression. You don't understand why this always happened to you- it looked fine when you picked it up in the store, it had so much potential to be flattering, but now that you're holding it while staring at your reflection in the floor-length mirror, it's just lost all its appeal. Right now it was just too lacy, too scandalous and far too daring for you to wear. Or maybe there was nothing wrong with it at all.

Maybe it was just you.

You hold the lingerie set against yourself once more in a desperate attempt to remember why you bought it in the first place, but it's futile. It wasn't like you could impress anyone anyway. You watch your reflection in the mirror as your insecurities begin to eat at your soul and you can feel tears pricking at your eyes. You hated feeling this way, yet you couldn't bring yourself to believe that you would ever be happy in your own skin.

You're too lost in your thoughts to hear the door to the apartment open, your obsessive thoughts pulling you in too deep to let you hear your boyfriend's calls for you. Jacob wanders the apartment, his worries starting to settle in when you don't even bother to come out to welcome him home, let alone yell from your whereabouts. A wave of relief washes over him when he peers into your shared bedroom holding something against your body but he can't see what it is.

"Hey love."

Jacob's voice startles you, whipping around to shove your lingerie back into its paper bag and sweeping it off the mattress and it lands in the corner of your room with a loud thud. You turn to face your boyfriend, hands interlocked behind you, your stance unusually stiff and you shoot him an awkward smile. "Hi babe."

He approaches you and wraps an arm around your waist, pulls you to him and locks his lips with yours. Jacob hums and smiles against your lips, but you don't engage in the kiss the way you usually do and worry begins to settle in again.

Pulling away, Jacob still holds you against him and tries to read your expression. Your lips are pulled into that awkward smile again and he doesn't miss how the light is absent from your eyes. Something is definitely wrong and he needs to know what's keeping you down so that he can get his girl back. "Everything okay, love?"

"Mhm," you mumble, trying to untangle yourself from his grasp but he lets out a quiet whine, tightening his hold on you and pulls you onto his lap as he takes a seat at the edge of your bed. He sets his hands on your waist and you instinctively suck your stomach in and hope that he doesn't notice.

"You're home early," you state.

"Just thought I'd spend some time with the light of my life," he hums, "so, what did you buy?

You wince, wishing that he wouldn't have brought it up, but it was your own fault for doing a poor job at hiding it. Yet you still choose to avoid answering him. "N-nothing."

Jacob glances over his shoulder, trying to see the brand on the paper bag and spots a lacy strap peeking out of it. "Doesn't look like 'nothing'. New outfit?"

"It is- sort of," you're tripping over your words as you get up from your boyfriend's lap and reach for the bag, "I don't even know why I bought it I'll probably never wear it anyway-"