Lost hope

Broken past

Aqil's Pov-
The hallways were so big, bigger then any of my old schools and i was so fascinated but tried to not show it on my face as i didn't want to seem more weird than i already was. To the corner of my eye i could sense a large group of girls looking at me. My heart start beating really fast as my eyes lock into one of the girls. It was like i could see her soul.

Long but not too long loose curls and brown skin. She was perfection. I had to hurry to my next class as i didn't know where i was going and didn't want to be late. We were able to sit wherever we wanted to but everyone had already sat next to their friends.
Yet their she was again, she walks in and she is just flawless.
"hurry up and sit here ammara before some low life does" her friend shouts.

My lovers name was ammara.

Her friend seemed quite bitchy but i didn't say anything but her face said it all. She definitely did not want to sit next to her, but thats a choice she made in the end.
The bell went and lunch time came around i seen ammara walking very fast behind me.

"Well you look like your in a rush love"

"Dont call me love, i don't even know you..." she says whispering.

"Well we can always change that."

"Your one of them arent you." She says in a firm voice.

"One of what?"

"One of them fuck boys who use girls for their body , am i right." She says.

"Nah not really, you just need to get to know me more".

"Whatever." She says storming of. But i admire how demanding she is, because belive it or not ive never had someone talk to me in such a way. It was hot.
Class was boring and i went home early even though i knew i shouldn't of been doing this no one was going to stop me. I came home and the first thing i hear is,

"Darling how was your day?"

"It was great mom, im going to my room now to think about how many days i have to go their again."

"Oh aqil, it will get better."

But will it though, everytime i have to change school it is barely my fault. I do not want another situation like my last school where they all found out what i did in my other school and everyone turned on me. I really wanted ammara to fall for me but i had a feeling if she knew what i did, i can kiss those chances goodbye and quite frankly her to.

Kissing her in my mind felt like such a happy dream, i wonder what it would feel like in real life.
She is the girls of my dreams.

2 schools back that i had been to i got kicked out for bullying. But it is not what you think. This girl had falsy lied about my bestfriend raping her , and the whole community turned against him. No one belived him but i did because i knew he wouldn't do such a thing nor lie about it. A couple of weeks after he killed himself and it was later revealed through a dna test that he infact did not rape her and she was let of the hook just like that.

I had lost my best friend.

News spread that she had bulimia and i bullied her so badly for it, due to what she did to my bestfriend. I would buy food from the cantine and pile her plate up with it and laugh with my friends and tell her to run to the toilet to go vomit. Id go to her house and cover her window in egg so she always had a reminder of food. Anytime id see her eating id bring a bucket and tell her to " do the honours" of making herself vomit.

Eventually after a couple of months i had gotten kicked out of the school and ended up moving states for a fresh start. I didn't care how badly i bullied her she deserved it.

A couple months into my new school maybe even weeks they had found out why I changed states and school , through i dont know who. No one knew the full back story as to why i bullied the girl with bulimia so severly but i didn't want to tell them as it was private and personal. They started to all turn their back against me and it was like i was back in my home state. Shit if i wanted this on repeat i would've just stayed in my home state.

Honestly moving states and school has been really hard on me and my family but i am trying my best to start new and fresh at this school. I met the girl of my dreams and didn't want to ruin it so i decided to make a little back story as to why i suddenly moved.

My mum and dad got a divorce and i had to go live with my mother in this state. I do have a dad at home but they wont seem to notice or care as i could just say hes an uncle or grandfather, all i wanted was a clean slate and not to of been reminded of my past day in and day out.