what comes after this
joy
maybe bliss
once my anger subsides
i wonder who is even left on my side
it's explosive
it's crazy
it's a mess
am i describing me
or the tantrum i threw at best
i'm stressed
but also so relieved
like music to my ears
but nails in my teeth
i can't have grace without a little bit of pain
if god exists he's heard me say the same three things
why me
please just let me free
can't i just live in peace
i push people away just to save me
sometimes i look in the mirror like i did today
i didn't see anyone to save
i only saw a girl
brown skin and brown eyes
crying about what is eating her up inside
pretty girl on the outside
but a raging bitch in the end
maybe that's why i get drunk at the family functions
after all of this
what comes later
not a drop to drink or a taste to savor
maybe for me
there is no later
maybe i just have to suffer
in a different life
maybe i would be free
but that is still so unclear to me
just like what is to come
will i have to give more and then some
i have nothing left to give
i just sit in it
basking in potential moments of glory and peace
hope one day they will find me
YOU ARE READING
take it how you want it
Poetrythis is a series of poems i have written about past and current events. everyone handles emotions differently, here is how i handle mine