Quiet • Sugarhillddot [EDITING]

010 ˢᵘᵍᵃʳʰⁱˡˡᵈᵈᵒᵗ

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

CHAPTER: 10

SUNDAY, June25
6:45am, 2023

I HAD woken up with the urge to smoke, but I knew I couldn't, I'm trying to stay clean and not 'clean' as in what I was doing before when I smoked a little and then let it be.

Because, doing that apparently had only made my addiction grow. But I just can't stop thinking of it, the feeling you get after a few hits.

Or the way your eyes dim and become red, the way the world shuts up and your thoughts become fuzzy. When everything becomes darker and suddenly it doesn't matter, the way you look or what's around you.

When, it makes you feel relaxed and content, the way you can just laugh about anything and everything.

I groan, thinking about it will only make shit worse, I think to myself as I get up putting on my outfit for the day.

I had ended up picking out a basic pair of sweatpants with a white top. I really wasn't in the mood to follow by my usual style.

I just felt a little to drained at the moment, interrupting my thoughts I had ended up getting a call. And when I checked the name read 'Darrian🤞🏾'.

"Hey"I say lowly answering the FaceTime call, "You look like shit"He laughs but his smile drops when he realizes i'm not laughing.

"What's wrong"He says confused, and I swear I hate when people ask me what's wrong because at that moment I just feel like breaking down.

So instead of crying while on the phone with him I just hang up which I know was uncalled for and rude but like I said I break down at that question.

Would he hate me for hanging up like that.

Shaking my thoughts away, I head downstairs ready to drown myself in a bunch of food. My phone buzzes again causing me to lazily pick it up checking it.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Darrian🤞🏾

What's wrong
READ✔️

What did I do?
READ✔️

You know what i'm
coming over
READ✔️

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

I SHUT MY phone after looking through his texts, I just roll my eyes at the whole situation. Before, I can head upstairs I hear a knock on the door.

Instead of saying anything I just open the door, he doesn't bother to even say hi as he pushes past me and heads straight for my room.

I just follow behind him now confused why he hadn't said anything and just headed straight to my room. Once, we reach my room he closes the door locking it.

I just shrug my shoulders and lay on the bed, when all of a sudden he grabs my hips pulling me up and next to him.

"So what's wrong?"He asks the one thing I didn't want him to ask, because I knew that by him asking that while facing me was going to be my breaking point.

I started crying.

I really fucking just broke out into tears to someone i've known for only two weeks. I finally cracked and I couldn't stop, the crying just kept going no matter how much I tried to hold it in.

"Oh fuck don't cry"He says pulling me in for a hug, by that action my crying slowly comes to a stop.

"I'm sorry i'm a fucking mess right now"I say truthfully hoping he doesn't look at me like some cry baby.

"Nah your good but if you don't want to tell me what's wrong I totally get it"His words caught me surprise because I didn't think he was going to be so understanding.

"I'm sorry but I don't know you well enough to tell you. But thank you for being here"I whisper before hugging his chest.

"No problem that's what friends are for ma heart"He plays with my long locs that we're currently in a ponytail.

"Yeah"I simply say before drifting off to sleep in his grasp.

︵‿︵‿︵‿୨TIME SKIP୧‿︵‿︵‿︵

MY VERY annoying alarm had woken me up from what has to be my calmest sleep in forever.

I look up to see Ddot is sleep which surprised me because I figured he was just going to get up and leave as soon as he realized I was sleep.

I tap him on the shoulder, "Ddot wake up"I say sort of loud in his ear causing him to shoot up and nearly choke me.

Ok not nearly he did choke me, "It's just me chill"I say struggling because he had quite a tight grip.

"Oh shit my bad Kylah"He lets go of me, "I honestly didn't mean to I swear it was my reflex's"He apologizes.

"It's fine, i'm fine. But you have to go because I have something I need to get ready for"I tell him not really wanting to broadcast the fact that i have therapy.

"Ok well i'll see you later"He gets up causing me to pull him in for a hug, "Thank you again for being here right now, I didn't know it but I really needed this"

"No problem, from now on all you gotta do is send me a text and i'll be there"He assures causing me to smile widely.

My mood had went from almost fully depressed to somewhat content.

"I'll see you later"I dap him up before he exits the room. After he leaves I go into the bathroom to straighten up.

I ended up changing out of the sweatpants and into some dark colored jeans and instead of my crocs I throw on my air forces.

I then look in the mirror to make sure I didn't have and crust in my eyes from sleeping, once i'm content with my look I grab my purse placing my phone into it.

Before I walk downstairs I just stop to honestly pray that I actually try with the therapist, because I have extreme trust issues but the whole point of a therapist is to open up to them.

So I just hope i'm able to do that so I can hopefully get better after a few sessions so I can stop spending my brothers money.

Now that i've prayed and promised to myself to open up I head downstairs.

"You ready"

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So sorry for this sad chapter but I feel like the other ones didn't have drama and I really needed to start getting into the deeper parts of the story.