"Deku?"
A soft sweet voice calls to me from the hall, one all too familiar. Of course Ururaka would want to check up on me, how could I be so stupid, she's one of my best friends!
No.
No, she doesn't care. No one cares about a useless deku like me. She probably just pities me. That's why she's here. She feels bad and checking on me is more a moral obligation in her mind than it is a genuine reaction to my absence.
I try to move but I'm still too weak to stand on my own. As I push myself up from the floor I find myself face planting yet again. I feel throbbing pain course through me as my whole body essentially goes limp. I must have made quite the ruckus because that timidly inviting voice immediately turns to one of panic as the door flies open, revealing what I can only assume must be the most pitiful sight: a useless deku lying face down on the floor, limbs sprawled out beneath it, looking more like a crime scene victim than a fearless successor to the legendary symbol of peace. I groan in frustration at my pathetic state... and maybe also in pain, but pain isn't something I'm allowed to feel so I'll just tell my self it's in self loathing, which isn't too far from the truth.
"Deku!" She screams as she runs to my side. Helping lift me from the floor. I can hear a distant crash in the kitchen followed shortly by a flustered Todoroki, a panicked Iida, and a concerned Tsu. Iida and Tsu must have come with her to check on me. I don't know how to feel about all the attention, the noise certainly doesn't help the ceaseless pounding in my head.
"I'm fine! Really I'm fine, just please calm down. All this screaming is making my head hurt"
"Oh! Sorry"
Uraraka gives me a sheepish laugh and an apologetic glance before staring back at the floor in embarrassment and shame.
"It's fine, I'm just..."
Weak?
Worthless?
Fragile?
A poor excuse for a hero?
"A bit worn out from this morning. I should be fine after a bit of rest"
"Speaking of" iida interrupts, "what exactly happened this morning. We were told you were involved in an incident and needed rest"
His tone is accusing like that of a worried mother scolding her reckless son on the importance of safety precautions and rules.
"Leave him alone it wasn't his fault" Todoroki spits back defensively.
"You were there too, so why are you refusing to tell us?" Iida raises his voice in frustration.
"Because that's an invasion of midoriya's privacy. He'll tell you when he's ready, if he decides he wants you to know. It's his life, not yours. Leave. Him. Alone."
"Sorry deku, we were just worried and decided to check up on you. Sensei gave us a free period to go help bakugou with something." Uraraka shrugged.
My chest tightened.
Help bakugou ... he was talking to my mom. Shit! I was in recovery girls office earlier too! They probably saw my scars and now my mom is going to know and she's going to be devastated! Both her and Kacchan still thought I was clean... now what? All Might is going to find out soon enough, so what am I going to do? He's going to take away my quirk and expose me as quirkless and I'll be right back where I started, just another useless deku. Even if he doesn't take One for All, everyone is going to find out about my past! Everyone I care about will hate me again and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I was stupid to think I could ever actually be a hero. Deep down I knew I was delusional but I somehow convinced people to believe in me and now I'm just going to fail them again. Maybe I should just end it. At least that way I don't have to live with the crushing weight of their disappointment. I'm just as useless alive as I am dead, at least if I died I would be out of the way. Kacchan or todoroki would be a much better wielder of one for all anyway. I should just kill myself and leave one for all to someone who actually deserves it. It's wasted on me anyway.
