What's Best For Her

Assumptions, Assumptions, Assumptions

Despite agreeing to resume their normal routine as best friends, neither Harry nor Hermione felt relieved at it. Both teenagers felt heartbroken at the prospect of them permanently being best friends with no chance of something more. Hermione had taken Harry's admission that he didn't know it was Valentine's Day and his willingness to let her go to the States as his admission that he didn't love her the way she wanted him to.

He was never good at directly expressing how he felt but he was a master, at least to her, at indirectly doing so whether through his actions or his choice of words. It was two days to Easter break and, while they had written to each other everyday like normal, Hermione was miserable at school and cried herself to sleep almost every night. Unbeknownst to her, Harry was in the exact same boat.

Ginny, Lavender, and Parvati tried to cheer her up as best they could but they didn't think Harry didn't love her. Rather, they thought that she and him got their wires crossed and were sending each other mixed messages. Hermione couldn't see how that was possible and she quickly shot them down, warning them not to talk about it anymore. She didn't need to hope that Harry loved her anymore, especially when it was dashed repeatedly.

Her parents had offered to fly with her to New York for a week-long holiday while she completed her interview and Hermione agreed easily. Spending time with her parents was sure to get her mind off Harry. She would only be gone a week and then be back in England for the rest of the spring and summer until fall when the program began. She wondered if Harry should be made aware of her plans for the week but quickly beat it back.

The bushy haired girl admitted to herself that she wouldn't be able to see Harry before taking off without wanting to stay with him forever. She knew that seeing him would render her powerless to follow through on her decision to sit for the interview. But, this was her best friend, she couldn't just leave without telling him about where she was going.

It wasn't often that Hermione was faced with a quandary she had no good solutions to and this was shaping up to be one of those times. The only solution that wouldn't hurt Harry any further was to tell him the truth about where she'd be going during her break. She would have to face her fears, tell him, and hopefully find the strength to leave him behind. A tiny part of her being wondered how much harder it would be when she eventually would have to leave for four years.

"Hermi, are you sure about this?" That was Ginny and she was asking the same question she had been for the past week leading up to the holiday.

"Yes, I'm sure, Ginevra," a testy Hermione replied.

The redhead put her hands up in surrender and hesitantly joined Hermione on her bed. The older girl acquiesced and moved aside. "Hermione, I really think you should just tell him," Ginny tried again.

"Ginevra, we've gone over this. I know how he feels about me," Hermione hurriedly batted away a few traitorous tears that dared to leave her eyes, "me telling him how I feel isn't going to change that."

"But you don't know for certain, all you know is that he's trying to be your best friend," Ginny shot back, annoyed.

"Have you ever thought that he's doing that because that's all he wants to be to me?"

"Have you looked from his perspective and realized that he's not bloody good at saying how he feels and that maybe, just maybe, he doesn't want to risk losing you?"

Hermione glared at the girl and said, "don't you swear at me, Ginevra Molly Weasley."

Regardless of the use of her full name and the cold glare Hermione was leveling towards her, Ginny remained defiant. "Why can't you just tell him once and for all that you love him?"