Poo on my hand (Short story)

Huh? WTF, MATE?!

It was Monday morning and I woke up with a smile on my face. The sun was shining, the birds were singing. I just knew it was going to be a happy day. And then I went to the mirror and looked at myself, still smiling. I applied cream on my hand.. -5 mins later "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Lazy daddy woke up and ran into my room. "VHY YOU WAKE ME UP, SILLY BOY?!" He then went to his room and went back to sleep. HOW THE EFF WAS MY DOG'S SHIZZ STILL ON MY HAND?! I WASHED IT OFF!! Monday morning.. School.. It was definitely going to be a disaster. I put a glove on the hand with poo on it and went to school. SOLTANAAAAA shouted, "You're bare stupiiddd! It's summer and you're wearing your glove on ONE of your hand!" "Yeah, that's because.. Err.. I broke my hand and I don't have a cast.." She rolled her eyes (which was a FAIL) and walked away. I sat down on a bench and the Bench Crew came running towards me and pulled my glove off. They were laughing when they saw the poo on my hand. I got embarassed. Fauz and Didil were bare like, "Wallahi, dfhgggfguy, wallahi, fhihfejkrea, wallahi, ytnheriute!" And I'm like, "SAY WALLAHI!" The Retired Manjuz were singing their national anthem, Manju mayeeeee, tisajikanayee! Futkii was day-dreaming about Liam and Austin Mahone.. Lucky was pulling my bra strap, Rani and Saleh had a cat fight. Emomah was doing the dougie (YEEE BOII!) Exactly FIVE seconds later, FIVE FRICKIN' seconds, NiqNiq came up to me and gave me a slap and a half! OH. MY. DAZE. I swear.. That prickk.. This time, she never got caught. Lucky bishhhh! Radu, Halz babyyy and Nabz were enjoying me getting bullied. The three gits were eating their crisps and chocolates while I was close to tears.. FOOLS!! WHY THE EFF IS EVERYTHING BAD HAPPENING TO ME?!!!! And I STILL HAVE THE SMELLY POOO ON MY HAND! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!