super rich kids | rosekiller

chapter 14

major tw this whole chapter: eating disorder, damaging behavior, weight/weighing, fainting, body dysmorphia. if you need help please contact  (855) 387-4378 for some help. eating disorders are very serious and i am not romanticizing this at all. if you need any help i am here! summary at end if you would like!

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evan found himself on the scale in the dorm bathroom, fidgeting anxiously. He waited for the little digital numbers to light up, a small smile gracing his lips.

106.5 lbs.

He was down .7 pounds from yesterday, much to his delight. It almost made the hunger pains worth it, knowing that he was losing weight. But it wasn't enough, evan wanted to weigh even less. He didn't really need to eat every day, right?

He set goals for his weight loss. He would lose the 6.5 pounds by Friday, and become 100 pounds in three days. He could do it, he just had to take it further. He just had to push himself, and he could achieve his weight goal. evan stepped off the scale, moving to stare at himself in the mirror. He pulled his shirt off hesitantly, standing up straight and sucking in. Not that there was much left to suck in.

evan put his arms up, admiring the way his ribs stuck out, his skin molding over the bones. He ran a finger down his rib cage, feeling the hills and valleys brush under his fingertips. His lips curled into a smile. He was doing it... he was losing the weight. evan would never be fat again, as long as he kept working towards his goal.

Once he reached 100 pounds, he would strive for 95. Then he would stop. 95 pounds. evan shivered with anticipation. Finally, he would be skinny, and no one would ever make fun of his weight again.

He had started dieting nearly three months ago, his starting weight having been 130 pounds. He was proud of his progress, losing what would soon be 30 pounds.

It wasn't that he stopped eating, no, that wasn't it. He just ate less. What would normally be a three-or-four meal day turned into one meal, if that. But it was fine, as long as he was eating. Nobody could say he wasn't.

bartty was getting suspicious, and it made the blond nervous. If he found out, would he make evan stop? Would he try and get in the way of evans happiness? He hoped not. The burnette boy had looked at him strangely, the night when evan had poured a bit of milk into a bowl and said he had cereal.

barty didn't believe him, evan could tell, but the burnette couldn't exactly prove anything, right? evan was being careful. he puts on a sweatshirt and crawls into bed, peacefully may i add.

-

evan woke up on friday morning, after fasting all day Thursday. It was difficult to move, he felt lethargic and dizzy. But it was fine. People could survive days without eating. And sure, evan had fast metabolism, but it was only one day without food. He was fine.

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"luv', wake up, wake up." evan blinked sluggishly, eyes focusing on his boyfriend. bartys hand was on his shoulder, shaking him gently. "Hey, you missed breakfast. I didn't see you at dinner last night either, are you hungry? I brought you some bacon." barty held up a small plate, three slices of bacon on it. evan wrinkled his nose, shaking his head.

"No... I'm not hungry," he insisted, pushing the plate into bartys chest. The blond frowned, narrowing his eyes.

"How are you not hungry? luv', when was the last time you ate?" he questioned worriedly. evan crossed his arms defensively, turning away.

"Yesterday." barty shook his head sadly.

"No it wasn't. Baby, you gotta eat, okay? Especially with your stuff," barty reprimanded. "Please?"

"b-" evans's voice broke, shivers racking his body. The boy set the plate down, climbing into bed next to evan. The blond leaned into him, sniffing quietly. barty murmured words of comfort, trying to hide his own fears. He didn't know how long it had been, but he wasn't stupid. evan wasn't eating, and it was becoming more and more apparent.

"Okay, darlin', we're going to go down to the kitchen and get you a snack, okay? You don't have to eat a lot, you probably shouldn't, but you have to eat a little bit, okay?" evan looked unsure, and barty could feel his heart aching for this boy, his boy. "Please? Will you eat for me?"

"...Okay." barty let out a relieved sigh, getting out of bed and encouraging evan to do the same. The blond took an uneasy step, legs shaking dangerously. With furrowed brows, barty scooped evan up, a little too easily. He carried the smaller boy to the kitchen, sitting him down before grabbing a small package of trail mix for evan.

"Eat." evan fiddled with the package hesitantly, nose wrinkled.

"please..."

"No, no, you're going to eat that. evan, darlin', you need to eat. What you're doing? It can kill you, okay, and you need to at least try to eat." barty frowned, watching his boyfriend's hands shake with the effort of trying to open the plastic. He took it gently, ripping the tab before handing it back to evan. "If you won't do it for yourself... will you do it for me"

"For you," the blond whispered, taking a peanut and putting it to his lips.

C'mon, evan, it's just a peanut. You can do this.

He took a deep breath before nibbling at the legume. It was fine, he was fine, and barty was happy. evan finished the peanut, sighing and pushing his chair back. barty smile switched back to a frown, shaking his head.

"No, evan, you're not done, you have to eat the entire package, okay?" The smaller boy grimaced, wrapping his arms around his stomach.

"Please don't make me..."

"I-" barty sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I won't force you to eat, but you really should. At least drink something, okay? I think we have orange juice."

"Water," evan stated, rather quickly. barty sighed again, making the blond shrink into his seat. He hung his head, trying not to show his face.

"Are you mad at me?" evan wondered, voice small and on the verge of tears. barty set a glass of water down, pushing it toward the boy.

"No, baby, I'm not mad, just..." The taller boy sighed, leaning on the counter. "You have a problem, evan. A real problem. You need to get help, and... I don't think I really know how. You need to talk to someone who knows what they're doing."

"No!" evan exclaimed quickly, eyes wide. "No, no, barty, they can't know, please..." He flailed desperately, trying to convince the burnette that he was fine. "It's not even that bad, I haven't lost that much weight..." barty looked unconvinced.

"You're lying," he accused sharply, brows furrowed in frustration. "I'm not stupid, evan. I could feel the difference when I picked you up." Despite the situation, that brought a ghost of a smile to the blonds shamed expression. He was small, he was skinny, his diet was working.

"I've only lost a little bit, it's not that bad," he repeated. Whether he was trying to convince barty  or himself, he didn't know.

"despite the fact that its a lie, i cant help you if you dont want to help yourself"

evan sighs "i know"

"you should talk to reg about this, he went through something similar"

"im sorry"

"its fine, we can get through this in little steps"

-

summary: evan's been eating less and less, and barty knows it. evan may not see the danger, but he certainly does.

please please understand im not golrifying eating disorders i am trying to educate people while furthering the mature side of this book. again if any help is needed i am here <3