when the last snow flake drops

5

I woke up to a very loud alarm from Han's side "bro can u put that alarm quieter, your ruining my sleep schedule"

"it was a mistake alarm, u can live" he said and turned around falling back asleep. I looked at the tile and it said '2:17am' I closed my phone and turned around

I stared at the walls beside me and thought abt the holding hands things 'what was I thinking?! I wasn't think straight that time. he has a gf and I got over him.' I thought

I closed my eyes and told myself to not sit next to him for this trip

that didn't go so well

the next day we went to the park so a walk, "it's 8am.. why are we going on a walk now." I complained and han chuckled "we're in America, let's be healthy" "tahst not a good excuse" I said and he rolled his eyes

we kept on walking and we saw someone familiar "isn't that ur brother" han said and I looked up from my phone "huh where" han pointed to a guy and I looked at him

"ur delusional, there's no way tahts my-" the guy turned around to reveal his face "brother." I said and the 2 of us locked eyes

he looked at me and I looked at him "okayyyy... oo!! a cute store! let's go" han sensed the awkwardness and dragged me away

"thank u han, I couldn't feel my legs for a while" I said as we walked around the store

we were walking around then my phone vibrated, a new post from jun.

han looked at my phone and said "open it" and I did

@wenjun

liked by @hwang.hyun and 6k others
caption : can't get moment of peace in this fucking house
view all comments
@yangyang : YA WEN JUNHUI YOU SAID YOU WERENT POSTING THAT
^ @hwang.hyun : let's continue that hm?
^ @yangyang : ur not making this any better.

I stared at the post and han patted my back "you alright?" "y-yah I'm fine. totally uh, let's find that therapist" I said and walked away 

"the exit is that way" "I knew that I was just testing you" han chuckled and we left

few hours later we were able to find one, ms.lee.

"you have to go everyday now until the vacation ends" I groaned "this is for your own good you know so shut that's whiny mouth of urs" han said and we arrived to the hwangs house

we opened the door to everyone in the living room "found one?" and I hummed in response "found what?" riki asked "a therapist for Felix-" changbin closed jeongin's mouth but it was to late

"a therapist?" "what why?" all the questions came flooding through and i sighed "okok, long story short I had these voices come to my head randomly and shit blah blah blah had some voices come to my head last night so we found a therapist today for me blah blah blah there" I said

"I'll be in the room if u need me" I said and walked upstairs ignoring the stares

I laid on my bed and closed my eyes to fall asleep, no idea if I even fell asleep cause I heard someone open the door "yo lix, we going to a restaurant wanan come" I looked at him "you didn't even have a chose to say no so go change" I rolled my eyes and he left

what I wore :

I took everything I need and left "you look straight" han said as soon as he looked at me

"I know" I said and left for the car, "hey wait up!" I sat beisde yangyang and hyunjin with yang in the middle so we said a small conversation until we reached to the restaurant

"you own a restaurant too?" seungmin asks and the hwangs "our aunties passed it on to us" hyunjin said and we all went inside

"hello mr and ms hwang, how many for today?" the waiter says "12" the waiter takes us to a huge table and we all sit down with me facing hyunjin.

"holy shit these prices." han whispered beside me, hyunjin must have heard and said "I'll pay for it, it's our restaurant after all" han smiled at him as I just stared

we all ordered and waited, I looked at the couple infront of me and they were being all lovey doves as usual

I ignored it and went on my phone for a while, then I got a call. from (you thought huh, you'll see who it was soon)

I looked at the caller id and han looked at it too "you sure u wanna take that?" I nodded and excused myself

"hello? yes this is he. o-oh uh ok. I'll be back next month, ok. bye" I hung up. I couldn't believe what I just heard.

my own mother. my own fucking mother. Can't believe she tried to frame me.

I sat down on the floor for a while and cried. I don't know why I was crying at all but it felt good to have a cry.

I finished my small crying session after a few minutes, I wiped my face and checked myself on my phone screen. I looked like I just cried but it was fine. I went inside and sat down back on my seat

han looked at me and saw my abit swollen face "you ok?" I nodded and he sighed

then our food came, ima let you guys in a little secret. I can't eat without feeling guilty.

ever since we broke up I found someone new to get over hyunjin, the relationship was going great at first but then he started to comment on my weight a lot. which made me starve myself

and ever since that moment, I've stopped eating as much. 1 meal a day and only water if I get hungry.

I've never told any one this cause I didnt want them to worry

this was my 3rd meal today. I couldn't but feel disgusted. I felt my body feel heavier each meal and I hated it.

I stared to my food and han nudged me, "you alright?" I stared at him and looked back at my food.

I stood up, took my jacket and left and walked away "felix!" han said and tried to follow me. "felix, where are you going?" I ignored him and got a taxi.

"don't follow me." and I left without looking back